Good morning to YOU! I’m sitting down at the computer right now with a much-needed cup of coffee in front of me after some rough sleep over here lately thanks to this little guy…
I say my coffee is “much needed” and yet it is decaf… Ha! I switched to decaf during my pregnancy with Ryder and never looked back. I will now occasionally have a regular latte and really FEEL it when I do. I’ve always been super caffeine-sensitive so even if it’s a placebo effect, something about my decaf coffee makes me feel a little more alert. Or maybe it’s just happy? Coffee definitely makes me happy!
So what’s the deal with sleep right now? We’re smack-dab in the middle of the four month sleep regression and it’s hitting us HARD. To be honest, I didn’t really think we had good sleep to regress from since Rhett has never been the best sleeper… but apparently I took those occasional 4-hour stretches for granted. They’re gone and it’s a little brutal.
We went through this with both Chase and Ryder so I know it’s temporary and that’s definitely getting me through this phase right now. Rhett was wide awake from 1:30 – 4 a.m. yesterday and just wanted to party all night. Thankfully he’s not up crying and screaming (as long as we hold him) but I’m not exactly ready to slip into my party pants in the middle of the night so it makes for some long nights.
My plan is to eventually follow the gentle cry it out method when we transfer Rhett into a crib but I’m also wondering if any of you have tackled some kind of sleep training when your little one was still sleeping in YOUR room? Is this crazy? I’d looove improved sleep but I’m not ready for Rhett to be in his own room just yet.
Morning
Even though it felt like the middle of the night blended into the morning for me yesterday, my day technically began around 6:30 a.m. when Rhett was clearly ready to be awake for the day. I skipped the workout I had planned in favor of a little more sleep and know it was the right decision for me. This is definitely the least consistent I’ve been when it comes to postpartum exercise due, in large part,to the pandemic and the fact that I’m not currently comfortable going to the gym and using gym childcare. I miss my mid-morning workouts so, so much and am just not willing to sacrifice early morning sleep for super consistent workouts when sleep is so rough. I’ll get back to more consistent exercise eventually but right now my goal of three strength sessions a week feels right for me.
Thankfully I was able to get a nourishing breakfast on my plate yesterday morning thanks to a little meal prep I did over the weekend. Chopping veggies and cooking a large batch of quinoa made this plate an easy one to assemble before Chase and Ryder were up for the day.
Ryan got the big kids up and brought them downstairs before he had to head back into his makeshift home office in our bedroom. I immediately noticed some snazzy capris on Chase, courtesy of Ryan’s laundry sorting.
You never know where the 2 and 3T clothing will end up when Dad is in charge! Ha! Oh and Chase absolutely sported those kid capris all day long.
Since both Chase and Ryder are still out of school for the next two weeks, our day was wiiide open. We spent most of the morning around the house, eating breakfast, reading stories and trying unsuccessfully to get Rhett down for a nap longer than 30 minutes while Chase and Ryder played together. Eventually it was clear everyone needed to get outside, so I suited Rhett up in his way-too-cute teddy bear bunting suit and followed behind Chase and Ryder as they took turns driving their Power Wheels Jeep.
The big boys in their Jeep + Rhett in his baby carrier is currently my favorite way to get out and about with all three kiddos. We’ll also do bike rides now that Ryder has his own bike but Ryder is quickly becoming very speedy which makes it hard for me to haul hiney after them with Rhett strapped to my chest.
(Whoops! Sorry for not flipping down the forward-facing panel of your carrier for a hot second, Rhett. At least he seemed to love licking it. Ha!)
We ended up stopping more than a few times on our adventure so the boys could look for fish and throw rocks in the lake and also play at the park in our neighborhood before lunch. Ryan also met us at the park during a short lunch break which was a highlight of the early afternoon for sure!
Afternoon + Evening
By the time we made it back to our house, everyone was hungry, so I whipped up lunches for all of us and we dug in!
My lunch looked like a quinoa grain bowl with chicken, sliced grape tomatoes, wilted spinach and arugula and goat cheese tossed in a creamy balsamic dressing. Yum!
Ryder went down for his nap soon after lunch and then it was Rhett’s turn. Rhett had a great afternoon nap the day before (2.5 hours!) so I had high hopes for another good one but he got the last laugh and only snoozed for 45 minutes before he was over it. Let’s just say my grand plans to work during the boys’ simultaneous nap yesterday went out the window. At least I had a second to respond to some emails and dive into some deliciously frothy hot chocolate before Rhett was up again!
The rest of the afternoon passed by in a blur of kid fun with the boys, a little laundry and some dinner prep. Thankfully assembling dinner last night was nice and simple since we had our latest Blue Apron meal on the menu.
It was delicious! We made Harmonic Pan-Roasted Chicken and Honey Mustard paired with Buttermilk Mashed Potatoes and Collared Greens using the step-by-step Blue Apron recipe card. The recipe coupled with the fresh ingredients delivered to our doorstep made the whole process of making this dish a breeze! It tasted like elevated comfort food on a plate and we were all about it.
We were excited to receive this delivery from Blue Apron as part of a limited time offering created to celebrate the release of Disney and Pixar’s Soul. The movie is currently streaming on Disney+ and Blue Apron created a handful of meals to celebrate the new movie! If you’d like to try out the remaining meal (a salmon dish that looks amazing), you can still order it through Friday of this week!
As longtime blog readers know, we’ve been Blue Apron fans in our house for years and the family-friendly meals we’ve received to celebrate Disney and Pixar’s Soul have all been easy to make and incredibly tasty. (Easy to make is key for me in this phase of life!) I personally appreciate the fact that the meals have all been well-rounded and include a decent amount of veggies since I’m always looking for new ways to prepare vegetables that taste unique and delicious! (I loved the addition of apple to the collards in last night’s dinner so much!) Also, our boys love “helping” in the kitchen all the time and were all about pulling their cooking stand up to the counter and helping me make this recipe. Chase, in particular, loved holding the recipe card and pointing out the next step for us to do together since the recipe photos made it easy for him to follow even though he’s not reading just yet!
After dinner, we spent some time putting all of our Christmas decorations up in the attic. They’ve been sitting in the hallway in boxes for several days and only driving me slightly crazy so it felt good to get everything out of eyesight until next year… though I am admittedly already missing our Christmas trees! The boys also had fun splashing around in the bath tub before we got everyone settled in their pajamas for some family story time before bed.
Eventually all of the boys were sound asleep and Ryan and I an hour or so to ourselves before bed. We definitely are not night owls to begin with and Rhett’s sleep regression makes it all the more crucial for us to get into bed as early as possible if we want to be functioning humans the next day. Sometimes the sleep I get from 8:30 – 11:30 p.m. is my most solid sleep of the night so I need it!
Before bed, Ryan and I chatted for a bit and then read our books until our eyes could no longer stay open. I recently finished The Vanishing Half and LOVED it and just began reading This Time Next Year, a lighter novel that reads a bit like a cheesy but cute chick flick. Have you guys read anything good recently? I am in the mood to read a suspenseful thriller that’s not too freaky once I’m done with my current book. Any recommendations?
Aaand now it’s time for me to sign off for the day and morph back into mom mode. I hope you all enjoy the rest of your week!!
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you are doing a great job! When we went from 2 to 3 boys, it felt like a three alarm fire with only one fireman (or two- if I was lucky and my husband was around).
It’s the best job in the world ( being a Mom) and also the hardest. Somehow we learn what works and make it over the mountain. Fatigue is the enemy that I found makes everything harder- so take care of your sweet self, lower your expectations and ” let it go” , as you wisely have figured out.
Thank you so much for your kind encouragement Anne! 💗
I only have one baby which I realize completely changes what a sleep regression feels like, but when RB started fighting against sleep, we put him in the zippidy zip (he HATED to be swaddled) and he slept so soundly!!! It also made the transition into his crib so much easier.
* full disclosure: RB is now 8 months and we are trying to transition him out of the zippidy zip and he no longer sleeps so I’m not sure I actually dodged the sleep problem.
Ooooh yes!!! So funny you say this bc I am planning to attempt the Merlin Sleepsuit on Rhett today as we transition away from the swaddle. Chase & Ryder loved it so my fingers are crossed!!
Can’t remember if you gave read The Silent Patient yet but that is a suspenseful book but not scary. Loved it!
Read it and loved it!! Such a good twist!
You’re doing great! My second just turned 5 months and I’ve also struggled with the question of if he’s hungry or just waking the last few weeks at night. I upped to 2 feedings/night for a while, but now I’m back to one, on the early side of the night (11ish). I never heard of the gentle-cry-it-out, but this is actually what I did for those few weeks when he was having a hard time settling! Those nights were HARD. You are not alone!
You mentioned short naps – have you tried offering an extra feeding right before nap time? I know they (who is “they” anyways?) say not to do this, but since I started doing a feeding, waiting 10-15 mins, and then putting him down for a nap, he’ll take a longer stretch (1.5-2 hours, consistently). I actually only do this for one of his naps (the one I need him to nap longest for!). Just an idea, of course you know what is right for your baby!
Great job feeding and fueling yourself during this sleep regression. It can be so incredibly painful! Drink your water and continue with the great meals….you are so using so much energy!
I just finished The Couple Next Door and am a little more than halfway through A Stranger in the House and have been totally sucked in by both!!
Does something happen with a baby in The Couple Next Door? For some reason I vaguely remember having this one on my reading list and then a friend told me that it might not be the best fit for me… I have a hard time with anything that involves children/babies in a scary way sometimes especially in the postpartum period of life. I’ll look into A Stranger in the House!
Yes, the baby disappears. Probably not a good read for you right now. With respect to A Stranger in the House – I wrote a short review on Goodreads “Basically it’s a book about unlikable, bad people doing stupid and bad things.” I don’t recommend it.
Oh yeah definitely don’t do The Couple Next Door then! A Stranger in the House doesn’t have any kids in it!
I cannot recommend the Taking Cara Babies courses enough. I have a 9-month-old and her tips and tricks have turned him into such a good sleeper. Hang in there!
When did you start doing the training? I bought the newborn class for my 5 week old but getting him to sleep anywhere but on us is impossible and making me feel like stretches of 2-3 hrs in a bassinet will never happen 😔
both times I didn’t really start with Chase or Ryder until they were six months! But I know when/I’d to start totally varies depending on mom/baby!
We started around then I think? (Everything is a haze from then.) I know he was seeping through the night by 10 weeks with only a few hiccups. STICK WITH HER CLASSSES! It is so worth the money .
I’m a FTM with an almost 5 week old with colic 😔 He only sleeps when on our chests or being held. I pray to God someday I’m able to lay him down in the bassinet and he actually sleep for more than 10 minutes in there 😣 and the sleep deprivation doesn’t help with post partum anxiety and depression. I’m scared of these future sleep regressions but I guess mine already doesn’t sleep 🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️
I’ve been there mama, there is a light at the end of the tunnel!! Baby will eventually adjust to the outside world and give you a break. Hang in there, those first weeks/months are so hard, especially with PPA/PPD. One day it will be a distant memory (that your mind will block out, ha).
I am so sorry Julie! Not having decent sleep is so difficult! I have two boys and I can’t imagine trying to take care of three with bad sleep. But you are doing amazing and it’s great that you are telling yourself that this is just a phase because it is most definitely just a phase.
Our vacuum cleaner was just sitting upstairs in our loft area for days, driving me crazy, even though I was the one who just could not bring myself to vacuum lol. I finally did it yesterday, and put it away where it belongs. Yay!
I did not watch anything on Netflix last year except for cheer in January. The pandemic, combined with selling our home, moving, and buying another home… There was just no time for Netflix. But in 2021 I have already managed to binge watch the babysitters club and I loved it so much!
I will never forget being at the beach and seeing my husband struggle to put an 18-24 month swim shirt on our five year old. He was like this doesn’t fit! I looked at them and said because that is for our baby! Lol! I love any stories involving clothing Mix-Ups. I loved that story that went viral about the dad who accidentally sent his daughter to daycare in a swimsuit, thinking it was a shirt or something! Or the bride who was wearing her dress backwards or inside out, the woman with the bathing suit worn backwards who almost got arrested, etc
I just found out I’m pregnant with our second (about 4 weeks along) and the reality of two kids is starting to hit. Mine will be about the age difference between Ryder and Rhett, I think. My son will have just turned 2 about a month or so before the birth of my second. My son has never been a great napper, I’m lucky if I get 30-40 minutes once a day. So I am utterly terrified about how I am going to manage no sleep during the night and no breaks during the day. Also, we finally (it took my husband a while to get on board) did a gently cry it out sleep training method with our son and now he sleeps great at night, but how the heck do you do that with a second kid when their rooms are right next to each other??? Ahhhh, so many questions! I am so excited to be pregnant again, as it took a year with our first due to HA, but man the panic of multiple kids is really starting to set in! I can’t imagine 3, so I bow down to you!
Hi!!
You are doing so great as a mama of 3 and thank you for sharing your day to day, love the day in a life posts! Just wanted to share we just completed a really similar sleep training method with our almost 4 month old (it’s the sleep sense program but its pretty much the same as the gentle method you shared) with success even if he is in our room! We even did it without the pacifier since he is not old enough to replace it and after 4 nights he falls asleep on his own and doesnt wake up as much!
Good Luck, I know not getting the sleep is sooo hard!
I agree with you about decaf giving a jolt. I am also sensitive to caffeine and usually opt for half caff, but I feel a little something with decaf as well. It makes sense since the caffeine removal process doesn’t remove 100% of the caffeine.
Good luck with the sleep regression. I imagine it is very hard. You are doing a great job and your kids always look so happy <3
Thanks for this and your post yesterday. I am awaiting the birth of our 3rd boy in the next couple of weeks, and while I am excited, I am also….nervous:) I have never been good with infant nap schedules (i.e., my kids mainly napped while I carried them in the carrier), but I am thinking it will be important to try with this one. I am also rather a control freak about cleaning, etc., so I am trying to prepare myself to just let things go a bit. We’ll see!
Re: books- I loved the Vanishing Half! For more mindless reads, I like “locked in” type thrillers and some recent good ones have been The Hunting Party (Lucy Foley), One by One (Ruth Ware), and An Unwanted Guest (Shari Lapena).
CST is really great for babies, and really helpful during sleep regressions! Keep it up, you’re doing great!
Sleep will get better!!! Just hang in their you’re doing a great job!!!
You mentioned frothy hot chocolate. How do you make that?
Sounds delicious!!!
Verity by Colleen Hoover is a fantastic book that meets your description! Suspenseful but not spooky. It is great!! I’ve read several of her books and they are all great. This one is different than most though.
I second this, Amanda!!
I’ll third this one! Just finished it and stayed up way too late to do so!
We used Taking Cara Babies program starting around 2 weeks old and it was wonderful! Our son was out of our room and in his crib by 1 month old and sleeping thru the night by 8 weeks. As far as gently sleep training with him in your room– I’m sure you could shoot Cara and her team and email and get their take. Our son had a regression around 4 months and they were able to walk us thru that as well! Good luck!
Taking Cara Babies has a course for ‘Navigating 3 and 4 months” aka the 4 month sleep regression. And it does address baby still being in your room! Hope you get sleep soon.
I just finished The Last Flight and it was so good. Super suspenseful but also a really quick read!
YES! I enjoyed it as well 🙂 Superfast read, couldn’t stop reading it.
Regarding a good, but not too scary thriller —
I just finished “Girls Like Us” by Cristina Alger — amazing! Last year I read one of her other novels, “The Bankers Wife” which was also an excellent read. Both have unexpected twists and turns, and while there are definitely some very dark scenarios in both books it was all so removed from what my own life is like (suburban working mom!) that I never truly got scared. Highly recommend!
Cristina Alger has written a few other books that I plan to read!
Hey Julie! Do you have a favorite brand of Decaf coffee? I recently switched and am avoiding ones that use methylene chloride to strip away caffeine.
Yes!! I love Thrive Market’s organic decaf! It’s awesome!
I was going to ask about this! It’s not the caffeine that I need or crave, but decaf often tastes poorly or I’m unsure of the decaf process. Anytime I get a latte after the morning or go to a local coffee shop, I get decaf because I, too, am sensitive. Even two cups had become a bit much for my stomach and anxiety. :/ So I reduced to 1.5 cups. Thank you for sharing these glimpses into your life! You’re doing a great job.
I just blogged for the first time in months and I’m continually impressed with how you blog full time with THREE kids!
I remember this sleep regression being really difficult – hang in there!!
Love your day in the life posts! I Just read Sister by Rosamund Lupton and am currently reading The Girl in the Mirror by Rose Carlyle. I recommend both!
Good luck with the sleep regression! The 4 month regression hit us hard with both of my boys, but as you know, you’ll get through it eventually. Hang in there!
Also, I just finished Follow Me by Kathleen Barber which was a great suspense thriller. Something in the Water by Catherine Steadman was another one I enjoyed last year.
You are doing an amazing job juggling blogging and 3 boys and still finding time to read and work out!
We’ve been doing some sleep training with our second still in our room because he will share a room with his big brother and we want him STTN before we make that transition. The biggest thing we focused on is making sure we get him to fall asleep independently at bedtime since that is the biggest hurdle and we aren’t in the room at that time! We did check ins in intervals and then do the same thing in the middle of turn night. We just make sure to not turn on any lights and I quietly grab my phone and start a timer. He’s about to turn 7 months and he still wakes up once to eat but we get an 8 hour stretch of sleep before he eats and then sleeps for a few more hours!
Hey, Julie! We’re in similar boats. My third is three mos and started showing signs of the four-month regression (apparently that can happen – coolcool), and nothing we did at night seemed to calm him for long, so finally my husband and I agreed we were comfortable letting him cry for a single five-minute period just to see what would happen… and at 4 mins 59 secs… he went to sleep! Before that, he’d only nap in the Ergo, but the next day I figured I’d try the five-minute timer again, and he was asleep by the time it beeped! Still tugs on the heartstrings to hear him cry at all, especially so young, but now he’s taking all his naps in the crib and is only waking briefly twice at night to nurse. He was waking only once before the regression, so definitely not perfect, but giving him the brief chance to self soothe was such a game changer, I had to share (my first comment on a blog ever!). Good luck!
Get him out of your room! He can smell your milk. My daughter cried it out for one night and has slept 12 hours plus every night sense. We did this at four months old and checked with pediatrician to make sure she was on board. She was actually the one who encouraged the cry it out. You need your sleep to function! Good luck 🤍
Omg! Julie you MUST read “Verity” by Colleen Hoover! It is so suspenseful, I was up til the early hours of the morning bc I could not put it down! And I don’t typically like reading suspense but she hooks you from the very beginning. As far as sleep training is concerned, I didn’t put my babies into their official crib until they were between 5-6 months. Until then, they either co-slept with us or they were in a bassinet right next to the bed. I think the older he gets, the easier it will be. Go with what feels right for you and your baby. You’re doing an amazing job mama! Keep it up!
Hi Julie, hope you’re doing well. Have you ever experienced a toddler sleep regression with either Ryder or Chase? My daughter is 26 months old and around 23 months she went from sleeping for 11 hours straight to waking every 2 hours. We did the gentle cry-it-out method with her at 9 months but she has now fully regressed and we are really struggling to get her to sleep well and self soothe again. She is also in a toddler bed for the last month as she could climb out of her cot so it was a safety hazard. Would appreciate any help or advice from you or any readers who may have experienced the same thing. Am desperate for a full nights sleep again.
Have a great day!
Oh I forgot to mention some book recommendations. In terms of thrillers that aren’t too scary, I really enjoyed the 3 books by Greer Hendricks- the best one being You are not alone. All 3 books were great, engaging reads. I’ve also just finished The Midnight Library by Matt Haig and this book was phenomenal. ☺️
You sound like you’re complaining about help from your husband.
With regard to Chase’s pants you mean? I was definitely just joking around and I promise you Ryan knows this, too. It’s just something that made us laugh!
We LOVED Taking Cara Babies and cannot recommend it enough. We used her from the beginning but she has a section on surviving the 3-4 month sleep regression and then a more “formal” sleep training program for 5 months and beyond.
Here is the old lady opinion re sleep regression.
1. let them cry it out
2. wear earplugs, play soothing music for white noise for you and the baby
3. talk to them in a soothing voice but do not get up.
4. take turns with mom and dad sleeping in another room … if possible … even if you trade off half the nights yu both get a half night of sleep
5. drink green tea for a little caffeine as it will wake you up in the am but not make you nuts (I like matcha and occasionally chai as it is both soothing.)
6. I always ran HOT … is Rhett the kind of baby that gets cold? I fought my mom from day one for overs OFF (53 years later I still don’t use covers except on my feet … is it possible he is hot?
7. I always put a sweater/sweatshirt in the bed with the baby that smelled like mommy or daddy…my GD loved a ticking clock beside her wrapped in a sweatshirt … just like the dog had…
8. USE ESSENTIAL OILS LIKE LAVENDAR in the baby’s area of the room….it make 10000% difference and for me it was my pharmacist grandfather (he graduated in 1920 … yes 100 years ago) who told me all about them when I was little as in those days it was herbs and plants and no chemicals.
9. take a deep breath … you know it goes away in the end
.s. THREE ENERGETIC BOYS now in your bio 🙂
Hi Julie! I totally can relate to the regression part of your post. Holy cow, we had an extremely rough month of December with our 5 month old son! I am a FTM, so I don’t have anything to compare my little boy to, but I truly think we got lucky on the sleep front…even as a newborn, although he would get up to eat every 2-3 hours, he would go right back down to sleep. Around 10 weeks, he would sleep anywhere from 5-8 hour stretches and although sleep was more bumpy in the fourth month for him, I thought we had made it through relatively unscathed. Well, he turned five months and I was so wrong. 😂 He would be up every 1-3 hours again, naps were 20 minutes, if that, and he was just so tired! Couple this sleep with rolling, trying so hard to crawl, starting solids, traveling 6 hours for Christmas, cutting his bottom teeth and oomph, December was rough around here!
I will say that as soon as he turned 6 months old, we moved him into his own room. The first couple of nights were a little rough (he had been sleeping in his crib in our room, but we’ve always spent a lot of playtime in his room), but for the past week or so he’s slept pretty solidly! I’ve also slept better because I haven’t been hearing every little noise he makes!
You are doing such a great job! As a fellow mama who has no family nearby, I know how hard it is with one little boy, so you are an absolute rockstar in my eyes to have three little ones! Thanks for always sharing and being so open and honest! Sending you love from NH!
This isn’t your first rodeo when it comes to sleep, but I would highly recommend the book (and Facebook group) Precious Little Sleep. Keep up the good work!
I just finished The Match and it was so good! A thriller but not too scary about a company that promises your perfect soulmate via a DNA match. It follows 5 people so the pace is quick which is good for reading before bed!
I just read Born Survivors and highly recommend! Three women give birth in concentration camps. Based on true stoeies. My daughter is my second, and is 7 mos. And also regressed badly at 4 mos. Merlin Sleep Suit definitely helped. Good luck, you will get through it. Sleep deprivation is so hard.