His response surprised me and took me off guard but he followed it up with thoughts about the year we’ve had so far, one that feels marked by loss. We talked about our miscarriages and missing Ryan’s grandmother. We talked about how it’s weird little moments that set off a grief spiral – like driving past Talbot’s (his grandma’s favorite store) or seeing pregnancy announcements for babies now due months past our second “should be” due date. (When will those “should bes” go away? They are miserable.)
Though this weekend included times of reflection and sadness, something I think we both needed, it also included sandy beaches, long bike rides, doughnuts and laughter. Hilton Head Island was exactly what our family needed right when we didn’t even realize we needed it.
And then I woke up yesterday morning and read about the shooting in Las Vegas and the sadness came flooding right back in. What a horrible, hateful and senseless act of violence… an act of violence that only seems to add to the growing sense of desperation for peace and kindness in our country. I felt like I was in a bit of a fog as I began the day and then I read a tweet from Ellen that said, “Care. Love. Be outraged. Be devastated. Just don’t give up. The world needs good humans today.” We really do need more good humans. Let’s all try to be one today and every day. Las Vegas, I hope you can feel the prayers that are coming your way from millions of people right now.
Hilton Head Island: Day One
There’s really no graceful way to transition into sharing the highlights from our weekend trip to Hilton Head Island on the blog today other than to say that writing about our trip made me smile and count my blessings for the bazillionth time. The trip allowed me to unplug, focus on my boys and enjoy the things I so easily miss everyday like the feel of sunshine on my shoulders or the sound of crisp leaves crunching as a squirrel darted away from me as I walked by.
Hilton Head Island is a gorgeous barrier island located approximately four hours from Charlotte in South Carolina. I visited the island years ago as a little girl but was too young to remember anything so this trip felt like a first-time visit for our whole family. We left for Hilton Head around 4 p.m. on Friday and settled into our condo a little after 8 p.m.
We were invited to stay at the Palmetto Dunes Oceanfront Resort (they were kind enough to cover our accommodations for the weekend) and we commented on the wonderful location of our condo in Huntington Villas a number of times during our stay. It was warm and cozy and located within walking or biking distance of the beach and everything else we wanted to do during our vacation. We went to bed fairly early the first night, anticipating a full day of activity and adventure on Saturday.
Chase shocked us by sleeping in until almost 9 a.m. on Saturday morning. He went to bed close to 9 p.m. on Friday night (his bed time is usually closer to 7:30 p.m.) and since he didn’t nap very long on Friday, I think his lack of sleep caught up with him on the first night of our vacation. This gave me plenty of time to hop on a bike (we rented two from Hilton Head Outfitters) and ride to Palmetto Dunes’ General Store to pick up coffee, milk, yogurt and other snacky essentials to keep on hand during our stay. There was something so relaxing and vacationy about beginning the day by hopping on a bike and pedaling through the morning haze to get coffee that set the best tone for our trip.
I arrived back at our condo to find Chase still sleeping and Ryan reading, so I sipped my coffee on the back porch, painted my nails (this “Grey Matters” color I nabbed a week or so ago) and enjoyed a slow start to the day… a very rare treat indeed!
Once Chase was up, Ryan and I did our best to hype up biking and Chase’s “awesome helmet” since we weren’t sure how he’d handle our first adventure of the day. As it turns out, all the hype wasn’t needed because Chase was all-in on biking from the very beginning.
He loved his seat close to Ryan, thought his helmet was the coolest thing going and happily road around with us for hours over the course of the weekend. Though many of you recommended renting bikes during our visit to Hilton Head, I don’t think Ryan nor I anticipated using them as much as we did. We used the bikes the entire weekend to get us to and from everything from the beach to activities to food.
First up on our agenda for the day was breakfast! A couple of you told me we could not miss the pastries and food at The French Bakery, so we bike two miles from Palmetto Dunes to the beautiful restaurant and grabbed some food and drinks to go. The French Bakery is located in Shelter Cove Harbor, a charming marina lined with various shops and restaurants and, most appealing to us, a large community playground Chase absolutely loved!
Ryan and I ate our breakfast (the quiche was wonderful), shared a cinnamon bun croissant and spent a solid hour at the park with Chase. Everything was fantastic!
Chase ate a bit of breakfast back at the condo before we left for the park but seemed fixated on getting the doughnut we promised him on our ride over to The French Bakery. When the bakery didn’t have any doughnuts available, Yelp came to the rescue and directed us to Duck Donuts. We first discovered Duck Donuts in the Outer Banks earlier this year and even though they recently opened a location fairly close to our house, the doughnuts still felt like a vacation treat and I couldn’t resist trying their seasonal pumpkin spice iced doughnut with cinnamon and graham cracker crumbs.
So good!
Feeling adequately full, we set back out on our bikes and decided to use them to explore the island. We biked all over the place and meandered along the streets of Palmetto Dunes where we gawked at some of the stunning homes and admired the beautiful grounds.
We ended up biking out onto the beach and spent the rest of the morning kicking around a soccer ball, splashing in the waves and playing in the sand and surf.
As a former Florida girl, I’ve seen my fair share of beaches and yet I can completely understand the appeal of Hilton Head Island’s beaches. The shoreline is vast and the sand is mostly hard-packed, making it perfect for biking, walking or jogging. The ocean also creates tons of tide pools all over the beach which are great for little ones like Chase who want to splash around and play but get a little too scared around the bigger waves. Over the course of the weekend, the beach provided a great source of entertainment for our family and we loved swimming, biking and playing random beach games in the sun.
Around 1:30 p.m., we headed back to the condo so Chase could sneak in a quick nap. Ryan and I used this time to shower, make lunch and relax together and I gave myself full permission to keep my laptop closed all weekend which felt AMAZING. Once Chase was up, we hopped on our bikes again and rode off to Pirate’s Island Adventure Golf.
I am NOT a mini golf person mainly because it takes for-ev-errr and I am awful at it but we decided to give it a shot because Chase is in love with the mini putter he received for his birthday and hits golf balls around our house all the time.
Well, as it turns out, bringing Chase along on our mini golfing adventure made it WAY more fun for me, too, and I actually enjoyed the experience! We kept it short and only played around 12 holes, didn’t bother keeping score and laughed hard at Chase’s attempts to get the ball in the hole which often resulted in him picking the ball up and dropping it in. (I feel ya on that one, buddy.) We left when our stomachs told us it was time for dinner and biked to The Sea Shack, the restaurant that popped up over and over again as the must-try dinner spot on the island. When we arrived, the line was insanely long and long lines + toddlers + starving parents don’t mix very well, so we opted to grab food next door at Chow Daddy’s.
We had a great meal and and enjoyed dining outside as the sun began to set. (Pictured above is the avocado toast appetizer we shared to start and it was fantastic! The chewy multigrain bread stole the show!)
Ryan and I typically avoid going out to dinner with Chase because it’s rarely a fun experience (his interest in food has always been low and if you couple that with trying to keep him still in a chair for more than an hour, you’ve got yourself a recipe for the least-relaxing dining experience ever) but we were pleasantly surprised when Chase seemed to enjoy coloring and hanging out while we waited for our food and talked about the fun we had so far on our vacation.
We biked home at dusk and made a pit stop at the General Store for ice cream and wine to bring back to our place before settling in for the night. It was a great first day on Hilton Head Island and I’ll be back again soon to share a recap of day two!
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I’ve never been to Hilton Head Island but I’m adding it to my list! It looks like the perfect vacation in my mind – condo near the beach, plenty of downtime with family, and no shortage of delicious eats. I’m glad the trip ended up being so revitalizing for you in more ways then you expected.
Thank you, Traci! It was such a great trip and I hope you love it if you make it out there soon as well! <3
It sounds like an awesome first day of the trip! I loved seeing the picture here and video on your Instagram story of Chase playing mini golf. I can totally see him trying so hard and thinking he was doing amazing with the confidence only a kid can have. This post is making me so excited for the long weekend trip I have planned at the end of the month. I can’t wait to see what else you did 🙂
Wow, posts like these always remind me that you are such a great writer. I mean, I know this, of course, because I’ve been reading for years upon years upon years, but the way you captured your (and our) reaction to the Las Vegas shooting was just so well done. You’ve done this before on other large occasions, and I am just so happy to return to your words on the regular and see what you add to the conversation. I’m also so sorry still about your many losses this year, for both you and Ryan, and I know that’s the kind of grief that takes such a long time to process (and really, we’re never quite done with grief. It rides shot gun for the rest of your days, but changes and morphs into a more manageable presence as time passes.) I’m sorry you’re having to manage it, but so glad you have each other and friends and family and sweet occasions like this to help you get through this crazy journey called life.
I have always, always, always, loved your vacation recaps, and this didn’t disappoint in the least! It looks like it was just a perfectly balanced weekend. Everything kind of lined up so well, and I’ve always wanted to bike on Hilton Head, so it’s fun to live vicariously through your trip, and imagine my own eventually. And those pumpkin spice donuts look INSANE! Wowza! I know a local orchard near me makes something similar, and you’d better believe you’ve inspired me to snap up a box asap!
So much to say, I could add more paragraphs, but just know I enjoyed this post very much, just as I always do. Cheers to many more bright and balanced days ahead for you all. <3
Thank you, Kim!!! <3 Really hope you had a wonderful weekend as well!
I love that you guys used bikes as your transportation for the weekend — that totally gives it such a beachy and laid-back vibe! Hilton Head is on my list of places to visit!
You are one hot mama, Julie! I went to hh when i was younger with family friends. It was gorgeous! If I lived closer, I would definitely go back. Excited for part 2!
Just a question… but why don’t you and Ryan have helmets on too? I heave seen and heard of way too many bike accidents and NEVER understand why many adults do not wear them.
On another note, HHI is wonderful, and it looks like you and your family had a great and much needed vacation!!
Hi Sue! We absolutely should’ve been wearing helmets — we truly didn’t think much about it since the bikes we rented were delivered to our condo without helmets for the adults but that was an oversight on our part and we should’ve requested them.
Was just going to say this as well! Glad you recognize your mistake and will set a better example for your son in the future!
This is my first time commenting on your blog. I’ve enjoyed reading! I just wanted to let you know that you’re not alone in your grief and fertility journey. My journey is eerily similar to yours. We had our son Landon naturally and two years later tried for #2. I made it to 10 weeks and miscarried and had to have a D&C. We waited awhile and tried again and I got pregnant and made it to 7 weeks. I miscarried naturally (awful!). We tried one last time and that resulted in a chemical pregnancy. Needless to say we were beyond devastated and confused. Why could I have one child but not a second? Grief was always there and it was triggered by Facebook baby announcements, the baby section in Target, baby shower invitations, etc. Finally, I decided I wasn’t giving up (I was now 38 years old) and went to REACH in Charlotte. I was diagnosed with secondary infertility. Our doctor recommended IVF because he thought our embryos were abnormal thus resulting in the miscarriages. Our first REACH appointment was January 2016 and we were pregnant with our second son on August 8, 7 months later. We had five embryos and all were normal so who knows what was really going on. I’m saying all this to say, I’ve been there and it’s awful. Since you live in Charlotte I just wanted to let you know about our REACH experience. Our little REACH baby turns 6 months old on Saturday 🙂
Thank you so much for sharing this with me, Monica. <3 I am so glad you have a beautiful 6-month-old right now after such a long journey. I appreciate the information about REACH as well!
Love this! I’m going to have to convince my husband to make a trip down to Hilton Head at some point 🙂
Riding bikes everywhere reminds me of Sanibel Island – we rented bikes and biked EVERYWHERE.
I’m so jealous of all the baked goods – those are the best!
You are so sweet and caring. Your words resonate so well with me! It looks like Hilton Head was so fun and beautiful. I love all the bike riding. My family would love to do that.
Hilton Head looks like such a beauitful trip, glad your family got the trip you needed right now.
We go to HH every year and love the laid back vibe. ITs always a relaxing getaway filled with bike rides, beach time and great food!
What an awesome little getaway! How fortunate that you were able to get it sponsored. That must be such a nice perk of blogging! 🙂 I’d love it if you could do a post on Chase and his eating struggles. I know you said food isn’t a huge priority for him and dining out is a struggle. I think it would be so helpful to other mamas if you shared a “day in the life of Chase’s eats” and how you try to sneak those veggies in! Did you guys bring lunch to the beach? Or did he eat before nap time? I have a hard time feeding my kids on the go. They know that their high chair equals meal time! How accommodating was your condo for him? Did they provide a lot of baby friendly stuff? Can’t wait for day 2! You look amazing!!
I loved your recap on your vacation to Hilton Head! Palmetto Dunes and is great place to stay, I’ve been there for a mother/daughter vacation in the past and it did not disappoint. Mom and I enjoyed the Alexander’s Restaurant to when we stayed at Palmetto years ago. I went back to Hilton Head again a few later, this time, with my mom, mamaw, my brother, and one of his friends and it still did not disappoint. It’s such a wonderful place and next to Charleston, SC, it’s one of my favorite beaches to go too. I’m so glad that you all enjoyed the trip and you all deserved every bit of the vacation. I look forward to your Day 2 recap. 🙂
We biked by Alexander’s Restaurant and it looked like a popular spot!!
Your vacation sounds so wonderful and relaxing! I bet you guys want to buy some bikes now, huh? We loved riding with the kids when they were younger. We got a hand me down cart that was attached to the bike. BTW, you look fantastic in your swimsuit! Body goals! 🙂
Did your kids like the cart? Chase loved the seat but if we ever have multiple children, the cart seems like such a fun option for kids to ride together!
Yes, they did but they never tried the seat, so I’m not sure for comparison. I would say if he likes the seat, he may not like the cart since it’s more enclosed and lower to the ground.
Fun start, can’t wait to see the rest. Glad you guys got away for the weekend.
Will keep this place on my radar for future trips. Looks fun!
How fun! I agree 110% on mini golf….littles make it much more fun!!
Sounds like your first day of vacation was pretty fun! I think one of my favorite parts of vacation is checking out new to me foods and restaurants.
i totally feel you on the going out to dinner bit! My 18 month old refuses – approx 50% of the time – to sit in a highchair at a restaurant and will rage about it lol. Then that leads to her either sitting on someone’s lap or she does whatever she wants. lol. we have no control!! we try every once in a while for dinner, and usually end up regretting it. We find breakfast/lunch usually go better so that is what we prefer to do. Your fam is so cute!
I just love reading your blog, Julie, and this post is a great reminder as to why I love it so much! You are so kind, so sweet, and a great writer! I just love your pictures, it looks like it was a fantastic start to a great vacation!! It looks so beautiful there, I will definitely have to add this to our travel wish list! So happy your family got to take a vacation you much needed!! Enjoy your week! Xoxo
This was such a sweet comment. Thank you, Kayla! You made me smile!
I feel like it was a poor scenario of leading by example when you had to hype chase up for wearing his helmet but you and Ryan did not wear yours. I am an avid biker and it is always very disapointing to see adults neglect basic bike safety.
I absolutely see your point and agree with you. The bikes we rented were delivered to our condo without helmets for the adults, but we should’ve been proactive and asked for them before biking as well.
What a fun day! I’ve never been to Hilton Head!
Kim
http://trendkeeper.me .. A Fall take on blazers!
You should set an example for your son by also wearing a helmet at all times while biking. As a family member of someone who is disabled as a result of a head injury I promise you it is worth it. Your son will never think it’s cool to wear a helmet if his parents ride around carefree and helmetless. Just my two cents/food for thought.
You’re right, Claire. I am so sorry to hear about your family member’s injury.
Thank you for sharing your words on grief. I really needed to read them today. We are three years this month from our loss due a ruptured ectopic pregnancy. It was my first and only pregnancy at age 46. I don’t think I realized that I’m feeling very sad still. Your words kind of gave me permission to feel what I’m feeling and to allow myself to have some moments this month to process through my grief.
On a lighter note, the nail polish link is not linking to nail polish.
Such a fun trip, thank you for sharing.
Oh Yolanda, I am so sorry for your loss. Someone once told me grief has no timeline and I completely agree. It’s almost like we’ll go along feeling okay and “normal” and something trivial (or big… ya never really know) will completely sideline us and bring back all those emotions. Sending you so much love. <3
Also, thanks for the head’s up about the link. Just changed it!
your first day sounds like it was a blast!! i’m glad you guys are getting away from everything for a few because having time to just re-boot and relax is so important. i love that quote you shared about being angry but not giving up – the world needs people who are positive, motivated, and kind to one another, and in order to be those things we need to take care of ourselves, too. <3
You will have to think about taking Sadie next time. Hilton Head is such a dog friendly beach. My little puppy loves it down there. 🙂
Palmetto Dunes is just the best! I used to go there all the time. Biking to the general store in the morning coffee was one of the highlights of staying there
Your photos are gorgeous (as always) – what a fun and rejuvenating trip. There’s something about being down the shore that feels so restorative. Glad you had a great trip with your family! Can’t wait to read the rest of the recap.
What a fun day! That is awesome that Chase slept in so late, what a relaxing start!
This sounds SO perfect! Glad you guys had such a wonderful getaway – all 3 of you deserve it! 🙂
love trips where you can do some easy biking to get from place to place. glad you got to unwind!
We love Hilton Head! What kind of shoes is Chase wearing? I’ve been seeing them everywhere and am looking for shoes for my daughter.
They’re Navtives and they’re awesome!! You can wash them off when they get dirty/muddy. Our fav summer shoes for him for sure!
LOVE! Hilton Head is one of my favorite places ever. We go a few times a year. It’s so relaxing and I always feel better as soon as we land. So glad you got some much needed R & R too.
OMG…I’ve stayed in one of those condos and others in the same area of Palmetto Dunes. I’ve biked to the general store a zillion times. I haven’t been there since 1997 and can’t believe that the general store looks just the same. So many memories came flooding back. Your first day was perfect!
Memories!!! 🙂 It really was such a wonderful place to visit! We loved it!
So glad you had a great family getaway. I loved following along on Insta Stories! And so fun you got to bike everywhere. I’ve always wanted to go on a vacation where we either bike or take a golf cart to all our destinations.
This sounds so amazingly wonderful and relaxing, especially concluding the evening with wine and ice cream! Also, I’m happy you kind of like mini golf now that you have a kiddo. Maybe that will help me love it more too when the time comes, because I am N-O-T a fan. Haha.
What a fun trip! I love SC! My parents live on Fripp Island, just north of Hilton Head (we can see Hilton Head’s beach fireworks from our beach on the 4th of July!). The low country is the absolute best. 🙂
I’ve never been to Hilton Head, but friends have told me we *must* try it. Now to find dog-friendly accommodations, because I always want my “kids” with me at this point in life. 🙂
Such a nice illustration of your family travel !! You are a nice writer indeed. Your child was so surprised just by seeing a dummy croc, am thinking what he will do when he will see a real one!! LOL ?