Early yesterday morning, my mom and dad called me to let me know that my grandmother, Mimi, passed away peacefully during her sleep Saturday night.
If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you know how much Mimi means to me. She was the matriarch of my mother’s side of the family and was always the spunkiest member of the bunch. I cannot wrap my head around the fact that I will no longer hear her stories and contagious laughter or feel the warmth of her hugs or taste one of her homemade sugar cookies.
This morning, I find myself sitting here, feeling the weight of losing Mimi, unsure what to really do with myself. When emotions have overwhelmed me in the past, one thing helps me work through everything and that is writing. So today I am writing a letter to Mimi, my beautiful grandmother.
Dear Mimi,
I love you. I miss you.
I miss the smell of your house. I miss watching you add an item to one of your many lists, your handwriting a perfect cursive that reflected your incredible artistic ability. I miss watching you spread jelly on your English muffin at the breakfast table in your silk floral robe. You somehow always managed to look glamorous at 7 a.m.
I miss the way you would use the words “tickled to death” to express your excitement over anything that brought you joy. I miss the way you would light up whenever you’d tell stories about Papa and the love you two shared. I know he was so happy to see you, the mother of his children, in heaven on Father’s Day yesterday.
When I learned of your passing, the tears came immediately. I couldn’t stop them, but I was surprised when I also couldn’t stop all of the happy memories that came flooding to the forefront of my mind. These memories only made me cry harder but they also left me with a feeling of comfort. I had 30 years with you. Thirty years with a grandmother who could not have loved her daughters or grandchildren more. Thirty years with a grandmother who absolutely could not wait to become a great grandmother for the first time.
Your reaction to the news of our baby is one of the most joyous memories I have of you. I will never forget the way your hands shot into the air or the squeal of delight that came from your lips when you learned you were going to be a great grandmother to a baby boy.
I wish with all my heart that you could have met our baby, but I will be forever grateful for the baby shower you and Aunt Laurie threw for me two weeks ago. You were surrounded by your family. Your sister, your daughters, your nieces and grandchildren and so much love and laughter!
You are at the center of so many family memories. Big Thanksgiving dinners at your house, served on your best dishes. Family Christmases in Gettysburg and long evening chats in your family room – you in your chair and Papa in his. A scotch on the rocks sitting on the table next to you, of course. Sanibel Island vacations and gigantic seafood dinners at McT’s and Gramma Dot’s.
We have so many memories together, Mimi, and I treasure all of them.
One story you loved to tell was a story about the time when you called my parents’ house to speak to my mother when I was very young and I answered the phone. You would laugh when you spoke of how I talked and talked to you for the longest time before you eventually asked, “Julie, where are you?” My reply? “In the closet.” Apparently I took the phone in the closet to hide because I wanted lots of uninterrupted time to talk to you. I crave that time right now, but part of me knows I can still talk to you whenever I want.
From what we’ve been told, you passed away peacefully in your sleep. I hope you were dreaming wonderful dreams. You’ve given me so many wonderful memories and served as a pillar of strength and love in our family for as long as I can remember. A social butterfly, through and through, I know you will be missed by more people than you can possibly imagine.
Count me at the very, very top of that list.
I love you, Mimi.
With love always,
Julie
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My deepest condolences.
Sending my prayers to you and your family. You were lucky to have her and she was lucky to have you too! I always think of her sugar cookies whenever you mention her! You and your family and of course your Mimi are in my thoughts and prayers. An extra prayer for you mom.
What a beautiful letter, Julie. I know your grandmother is smiling down on you from heaven and can’t wait to watch you become a mother. While there is never a “right time” to go, I’m glad that you got to spend time with her so recently and make even more memories. Hugs to you and your family – you are all in my thoughts and prayers!
So, so incredibly sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing this beautiful letter – sending prayers and positive vibes to you and your family at this difficult time.
I am so sorry for your loss Julie. Your grandmother seems like such a special and amazing lady. May she rest in peace and may you find healing in your memories of time spent with her. Lots of love!
Julie, this is an incredibly touching post and you definitely captured your relationship with your beautiful grandmother. I am so sorry for your loss. In all the pictures you posted of her she had a huge smile on her face and looked so full of life and love. I hope writing this brought you some comfort. It’s clear she was so loved and loved as much in return.
What a sweet letter you wrote to your mimi. All my grandparents are gone. I do have good memories too so that helps. We will one day get to see all of them again and all the family we never got to meet born before them. That’s very exciting. Hugs to you Julie.
I’m so sorry for your loss Julie.
Soon you will be a new little new person in your life. Your grandma will be there with you sharing this special moment, even if she cannot be physically there.
Sending you lots of strength and good thoughts.
Oh Julie! I am so sorry for your loss!
My all-time favorite post on your blog is the one featuring your dear grandmother and her reaction to the news that you and Ryan are expecting. It’s true you can see the excitement and glee in her.
My thoughts are with you and your family!
I am so sorry for your loss. She sounded like a wonderful lady.
So sorry for your loss Julie. Sounds like your grand mother was a beautiful woman inside and out.
My thoughts are with you and your family
What a beautiful letter. I’ve been your “friend” for a few years now and when I saw how happy your Mimi was when you announced your pregnancy, I had a huge smile on my face! Her reaction was everything! I share your tears because I know exactly how it feels to lose a grandparent, and I hope and pray for strength and comfort for you and your family. She’s just sleeping. 🙂 God bless you and yours and know that He has an awesome partner up there now, probably just as ecstatic as she was when you gave her the baby news! Lots of hugs! *hugs*
I am so sorry for your loss <3 My thoughts are with you and your family. xo
So sorry to hear of your grandmother’s passing. She sounds like a wonderful lady and it is wonderful that you have so many great memories of her to treasure.
Im so sorry for your loss! When we face affliction in this world, we often tend to lose our grasp on our assurance and hope. I often tend to wonder whether our suffering indicates Gods absence from our lives. However, such trials are evidence that we belong to Him. Just as Jesus’s own path to glory was through pain, so too is this true for us. We can find hope in the one who sent His son for us to experience eternal life. What a blessing it is to have such a great relationship and memories with your grandma!
I am so sorry to hear this, Julie. It was so clear how much you loved her! So special that you had a presence like that in your life.
What a beautiful and touching letter to your Mimi. I think you definitely brought all your readers into that special relationship with her. I know I felt like I was right there. Thoughts and prayers to you and your family. May the memories fill your heart.
Julie- I am so sorry for your loss. I have been following your blog for quite some time and although we have never met I feel like I do know you. I feel your pain in this moment as I just lost my grandma in October. Like you said, remember all those happy memories you had with her and hold on to them. She will surely be watching over you and that little baby boy! Once again, I am so sorry!
I am so very sorry to hear of the loss of your Grandmother Mimi. Sending lots of love and warm hugs to you and your family.
I am incredibly sorry for your loss. Your letter was absolutely beautiful. Wishing you peace and strength during this difficult time.
Praying for you and your family during your loss. I am so sorry.
I am so very sorry to hear of the loss of your Grandmother Mimi. Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.
Aww I am so sorry, Julie. It is always very hard losing loved ones. Keep the memories alive! My thoughts are with you.
Julie,
As someone who was essentially raised by a trio of her mom, dad, and Nana, my heart aches for you. My Nana is by far the most important and influential person in my life and shaped me to who I am today. I see or speak to her almost daily and the thought of losing her terrifies me. I admire your strength to focus on your Mimi’s spirit and happy memories in the midst of such sadness. You are a strong person and remember it is okay to cry, it’s okay to be sad, take the time you need to cope and remember your family, friends, and blog readers are there beside you. xo Stacie
So sorry for your loss, Julie! Your family is in my prayers!! Your letter to her was so beautiful! I loved the pictures, too!! What great memories you have with her!!!
She will definitely be watching over you from heaven!! Until you meet again! 😉
I’m so sorry for your loss. This is a beautifully written tribute to her.
so sad for your loss. i’m flying to ny wednesday morning for what will most likely be my last visit with my grandpa. it’s all part of living, but it’s never easy. lots of love.
I am so sorry for your loss. Sending prayers for understanding and comfort to your family. It sounds as if she passed without pain and I pray she has left her earthly suffering behind for something much more magnificent in Heaven. Your beautifully written eulogy reminds me so much of my grandmother (I couldn’t get through it with dry eyes). Again, I am sorry for your loss.
What a beautiful tribute you wrote, So sorry you lost someone so very dear to you. It sounds like she went the best possible way. I understand what it’s like to lose someone special before an upcoming big event. I know you’ll cherish having had her presence at your shower. Prayers for ypu and your family.
I’m so sorry to hear this Julie. many prayers and blessings to your family.
Sunday makes 4 years since my Mima passed, and not a day goes by that I don’t think of her. tears still flow a lot, but I know she’s watching over us, as I know your Mimi is, too. God bless 🙂
So so sorry for your loss! Prayers for you and your family. I loved reading your sweet words about your Mimi and know she will be in your memories and heart forever! Thankfully we know that God has prepared a very special place for her with streets of gold!
So sorry for your loss Julie. No words can make this loss better but reflect on all the wonderful memories you have of her and all the love she brought into your life. Your baby boy has a new guardian angel in heaven to watch over him, protect him and care for him from there.
So beautiful! I am so very sorry for your loss and praying for you and your family!
I am so sorry for your loss, Julie. I know exactly how you feel losing a grandparent. All 4 of mine have been gone for some time now and I miss them every day. This letter you wrote to her is very touching. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this time.
so so sorry for your loss Julie, Hugs from Irelandxxxxx
This was just beautiful! Made me cry…God’s peace to you and your family as your celebrate Mimi’s Homecoming!
You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers Julie! Just this past week my family & I have attended 3 funerals. The first guy collapsed in his kitchen and didn’t make it, the second guy had an unknown infection on his heart and went through so much trauma in the hospital leading up to his passing, and the third guy was killed on his way traveling to the first guy’s funeral. Sadly, this year has been a year of deaths for my family & friends and our community, but it has reminded us all to be thankful for the time we have with the people still with us. We have repeatedly been reminded to cherish everyone moment we have and hug & love our loved ones every chance we get. I hope you can find comfort in knowing your Mimi is watching over you & your family and all of the beautiful memories you were able to share together.
xoxo
So sorry for your loss. That was a beautiful letter.
so sorry for your loss <3 what a beautiful letter to her. xox
Just catching up on your blogs. So very sorry to hear about your grandmother. What a touching letter to her, brought tears to my eyes. Thanks for sharing – brought back wonderful memories of my grandmother too. Hugs!