Early yesterday morning, my mom and dad called me to let me know that my grandmother, Mimi, passed away peacefully during her sleep Saturday night.
If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you know how much Mimi means to me. She was the matriarch of my mother’s side of the family and was always the spunkiest member of the bunch. I cannot wrap my head around the fact that I will no longer hear her stories and contagious laughter or feel the warmth of her hugs or taste one of her homemade sugar cookies.
This morning, I find myself sitting here, feeling the weight of losing Mimi, unsure what to really do with myself. When emotions have overwhelmed me in the past, one thing helps me work through everything and that is writing. So today I am writing a letter to Mimi, my beautiful grandmother.
Dear Mimi,
I love you. I miss you.
I miss the smell of your house. I miss watching you add an item to one of your many lists, your handwriting a perfect cursive that reflected your incredible artistic ability. I miss watching you spread jelly on your English muffin at the breakfast table in your silk floral robe. You somehow always managed to look glamorous at 7 a.m.
I miss the way you would use the words “tickled to death” to express your excitement over anything that brought you joy. I miss the way you would light up whenever you’d tell stories about Papa and the love you two shared. I know he was so happy to see you, the mother of his children, in heaven on Father’s Day yesterday.
When I learned of your passing, the tears came immediately. I couldn’t stop them, but I was surprised when I also couldn’t stop all of the happy memories that came flooding to the forefront of my mind. These memories only made me cry harder but they also left me with a feeling of comfort. I had 30 years with you. Thirty years with a grandmother who could not have loved her daughters or grandchildren more. Thirty years with a grandmother who absolutely could not wait to become a great grandmother for the first time.
Your reaction to the news of our baby is one of the most joyous memories I have of you. I will never forget the way your hands shot into the air or the squeal of delight that came from your lips when you learned you were going to be a great grandmother to a baby boy.
I wish with all my heart that you could have met our baby, but I will be forever grateful for the baby shower you and Aunt Laurie threw for me two weeks ago. You were surrounded by your family. Your sister, your daughters, your nieces and grandchildren and so much love and laughter!
You are at the center of so many family memories. Big Thanksgiving dinners at your house, served on your best dishes. Family Christmases in Gettysburg and long evening chats in your family room – you in your chair and Papa in his. A scotch on the rocks sitting on the table next to you, of course. Sanibel Island vacations and gigantic seafood dinners at McT’s and Gramma Dot’s.
We have so many memories together, Mimi, and I treasure all of them.
One story you loved to tell was a story about the time when you called my parents’ house to speak to my mother when I was very young and I answered the phone. You would laugh when you spoke of how I talked and talked to you for the longest time before you eventually asked, “Julie, where are you?” My reply? “In the closet.” Apparently I took the phone in the closet to hide because I wanted lots of uninterrupted time to talk to you. I crave that time right now, but part of me knows I can still talk to you whenever I want.
From what we’ve been told, you passed away peacefully in your sleep. I hope you were dreaming wonderful dreams. You’ve given me so many wonderful memories and served as a pillar of strength and love in our family for as long as I can remember. A social butterfly, through and through, I know you will be missed by more people than you can possibly imagine.
Count me at the very, very top of that list.
I love you, Mimi.
With love always,
Julie
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Julie, I am deeply sorry for your loss! It is never easy losing a grandparent. Your letter is so beautiful and I can assure you she read it <3
Julie I am so sorry to hear! As a long time blog reader, I always loved seeing pictures of your Mimi, with her giant smile. Your baby boy will have the best guardian angel
Sending hugs and good thoughts your way. So sorry for your loss, sounds like Mimi was one spunky lady, who left behind many great memories for you.
Hi Julie! I’m sending condolences to you and your family. MiMi was a wonderful woman, and I’m so glad you were able to recently see her.
Beautiful letter, Julie. I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers <3
I’m very very sorry for your loss, Julie. My thoughts are with you and your family. In AOT.
So sorry for your loss. Your letter was so beautifully written and it sounds like she was a wonderful lady with lots of fun memories!
I am so, so very sorry to learn about the passing of your grandmother. Your letter brought me to tears. I also had a dear grandmother who I adored. We were best friends. She passed away at 102. I was so fortunate to have her for so many years, but it was not enough. She was my rock. I, too was heartbroken when she died, and cried for hours. I think of her every day and feel so blessed to have had her in my life. Julie, your grandmother will always be in your heart and she will always watch over you and your son.
So sorry for your loss, Julie. May the memories of Mimi live on and comfort you.
That was beautiful, Julie! I lost my great grandmother my junior year of high school & my grandmother my senior year of college. I’m 33 now & miss them almost like it was yesterday. I’ll be thinking about you & your family.
Julie, I am so sorry for your loss. This was such a beautiful idea, to write her a letter. It’s obvious that she meant the world to you and your family.
My prayers are with you and your family.
I am so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful letter and tribute to your mimi. By your many posts I know she was an incredible lady who loved and was loved deeply. The pictures from when you told her about your baby are so special – pure joy on her face! Thank you for sharing and again I’m so sorry for your loss.
I am sorry for your loss. Even through pictures she exuded such vibrancy for life!
So sorry for your loss. This however was a beautiful way to remember and honor her and share some of the best parts about her.
Julie, I’m so very sorry for the loss of your beautiful grandmother. I feel as though we all knew her thru your blog and one of my favourite things on your blog was her reaction to the news of your pregnancy. How fortunate that all the women in her family were together with her for,your shower just a short few days ago. Your letter to her was so touching. I’m sure you will share all your wonderful memories with your son and he will know and love her thru you. My thoughts are with you and your family. Mary
Hugs to you Julie – so sorry for your loss.
I am very sorry for your loss. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.
Julie,
I’m so sorry for your loss.
Your writing is so beautiful and every-time Mimi would show up on the blog, I got so excited! Her sweetness came through the pictures and your blog.
I never met either of my grandmothers and I felt, through you, that every grandma is supposed to be as awesome and sweet as Mimi. I was elated that she was able to be at your baby shower and was thinking how amazing of an opportunity that must have been for her, to experience that with you and your mom.
You and your family are in my prayers.
I am so sorry about your loss. What a beautiful post. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
My heartfelt sympathy to you. Your letter was a beautiful tribute and I hope those words and your memories help comfort you during this difficult time.
So sorry for your loss. I loved that picture of her too when she got the news that you were expecting. Hugs to you right now.
So sorry for your loss, Julie. It’s so apparent that Mimi was loved and will be missed dearly by everyone in your family. The next few months will be tough and random things will bring the sadness back when you least expect it, but keep the happy memories in the forefront of your mind and share all of them with your baby when he arrives.
Aww, Julie… I’m so sorry. Your letter is beautiful.
So sorry to hear about your Mimi, Julie! That letter is beautiful. Sounds like she had a wonderful life and was certainly lucky to have you in it! Hang in there and know that she’s always right there with you – particularly over these next few months as you get ready to welcome your son into the world!
Julie, I am so sorry for your loss. At least you have comfort in knowing her passing was painless and now she’s in a better place! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Your Mimi is smiling down at you always <3
I am a long-time reader, but this is my first comment. I’m so so sorry for your loss. I know how special grandparents are. Your letter was beautiful!
I’m crying now. So sorry to hear about mimi.
My grandmother is also mimi, and she is 97 (I will be 29 next Monday). I feel like they have a lot in common. My papa passed away when I was 17, and I know the last 12 years have been difficult for her without him.
It’s so special that we have relationships with our grandparents…I know she will be watching from heaven when you have your son!
Julie and Family, I’m very sorry for your loss. It sounds like your Mimi was a very special lady. Your picture of her raising her hands in complete joy when you announced your pregnancy is one of my favorite blog pictures ever–so, so sweet. May God comfort you during this time.
I’m so sorry for your loss. My Nana passed away when I was 8 months pregnant and it was so, so hard. I was so disappointed that she never got to meet her great grandchild. My daughter is 7 now and I still miss her so much. I know she would have a lot of great advice for me as a mom. But know that your Mimi is always looking down on you, and she is your baby boys special guardian angel.
Oh Julie I am so very sorry for your loss. Losing a grandparent is not easy, and I am thinking of you and your family today!
I’m so sorry for your loss. Your letter was beautiful and paints a picture of an amazing woman. I think we’ll all be calling our grandmas today.
So very sorry for your loss Julie. Your letter to your Mimi was beautiful and it made me cry thinking about my Nana. She passed shortly after I turned 31. It’s almost been a year now and I miss her everyday. Talking about all the memories helps and boy you’ll have a lot to talk about after 30 years with her. Thoughts and prayers for you and your family <3
This is a beautiful letter that I know she appreciates very much. Her joy and spunkiness shine through even in photos, and it’s obvious that she loved hard and was loved dearly. I’m sorry for your loss.
Julie, I’m so sorry for your loss. I know the loss of a grandmother can be profound and life changing. Take comfort that maybe Mimi just wanted to be the first to meet your son, before God send’s him to you. Take care, and God bless.
Thouhts and prayers to you and yours. God only cries for the living because we’re the ones who have to carry on.
So sorry for your loss. Your letter to your Mimi is so eloquent, and sounds like a conversation with her. I hope you continue to use those happy memories to deal with the grief.
Such beautiful sentiments!
Your letter made me cry at my desk. What a beautiful tribute to a beautiful woman. I’m thinking of you and your family today. Love in AOT!
I’m so very sorry for your loss. This is a beautifully written letter. How lovely that you got to see her just a couple of weeks ago at your shower. Your Mimi sounds like such a fun lady! You and your family will be in my prayers. Grandmothers are such special people.
I’m sorry for your loss. I love reading about your family and mimi. Even as a stranger, it was obvious to me what a great person she was.
I’m so sorry for your loss!
I am so very sorry to hear about your grandmother. You were so blessed to have her in your life for 30 years. I lost my grandmother very young and my other grandmother passed away before I was born. Those memories you will treasure for the rest of your life.
I am so sorry for your loss, Julie. Grandma’s have a special way of touching our hearts and our lives. She definitely had a special glow. Thinking of you and your family during this difficult time. May she forever live on in you <3
I’m so sorry for your loss, Julie. I lost my Mommom two years ago and I still find myself crying day to day. She was my rock and the person who never made me feel down on myself. I loved her dearly. She never met your baby boy, but your baby boy brought the baby shower so you got to see her one last time. <3 Hugs to your family.
So sorry sweet girl. My heart breaks for you. how wonderful that you had the most wonderful grandma in the world. And for 30 years… Such a blessing. And what a blessing you and your sweet baby were to her ❤️ ((Hugs))
I am so sorry for your loss. This post brought tears to my eyes. I lost my own Grammy a few years ago – and I still wish for the particular smell of her things and the hilarious way she viewed everything – equal parts NYC-cynicism and Grandmotherly-love. I hope that you find comfort in your memories of such a special woman.
So unbelievably sorry for your loss. Beautifully written post. Sending all my love your way!
So sorry for your loss Julie. I can only imagine how difficult this must be for you and your family. I too lost my grandmother recently and it was pretty devastating for our family as well. I take comfort in the fact that she is now in a better place and likely having the time of her life. Your grandmother will live on in the stories you share about her, and in the memories you keep with you throughout your life. Sending my thoughts and prayers to you …
I’m sorry to hear about your grandmother’s passing. My grandmother also passed away while I was pregnant with my first daughter (her first great-grandchild). It was very sad, but I liked to think that they had some special time together in heaven before my daughter joined our family on earth. Choosing children’s names is so personal, but each of my 3 daughters have their middle names after grandparents. It’s a special way that we will always be able to honor the grandparents that we love so much. Lots of love to you and your family.
I’m sorry to hear about your grandmother’s passing. My grandmother also passed away while I was pregnant with my first daughter (her first great-grandchild). It was very sad, but I liked to think that they had some special time together in heaven before my daughter joined our family on earth. Choosing children’s names is so personal, but each of my 3 daughters have their middle names after grandparents. It’s a special way that we will always be able to honor the grandparents that we love so much. Lots of love to you and your family.
I’m so sorry for your loss. My grandma (my mom’s mother) just passed away a little over a month ago, so I understand a little of what you’re going through. Sending prayers for you and your family.