A Quick Note
I know baby sleep is a suuuuper sensitive subject in the parenting world, so please know that I truly have zero judgment toward the sleep training methods parents choose to use with their little ones. We all approach baby sleep a little differently because we all have different babies (and doctors!) and that’s awesome. I believe all parents are just doing the very best we can and what I will be sharing below related to our sleep training experience is simply what we felt was best for our baby and what seems to be working for us. You and your baby may be completely different and that’s great! Do your thang, mamas!
Leading Up To Sleep Training
I’ve been pretty candid on this blog when it comes to sharing our baby sleep struggles. At six-and-a-half months old, Chase was still nowhere near close to sleeping through the night. We’d put him to bed between 6:30 and 7 p.m. and he’d typically be up to nurse three times a night around 11 p.m., 2 a.m. and 4 a.m. Day to day, this would vary slightly, but that was Chase’s sleep pattern for the most part.
At Chase’s six-month pediatric visit, our pediatrician strongly urged us to work with Chase to encourage him to sleep through the night. In my head, I knew it was probably time to do something, but Chase’s small size made me so nervous to drop his nighttime feedings. Our pediatrician said that Chase’s weight is perfectly healthy, but that the mothers of smaller babies often struggle the most with the thought of dropping middle-of-the-night nursing sessions.
When I explained that Chase’s best and longest feedings happened at night and he only nursed for short durations during the day, Chase’s doctor said he had a feeling this was because Chase is excitable and distractible during the day and not really all that hungry because he’s filling his tank at night.
In his words, “Why wouldn’t Chase prefer to eat a bunch at night when nothing interesting is happening and only eat a little bit during the day when he has playmates and activities to entertain him?”
This clearly is something we wanted to reverse… More calories in his belly in the day and less at night.
Our pediatrician assured me Chase would not starve if we dropped his nighttime nursing sessions and would make up for the missed calories during the day. (He also said I could bring Chase in for another visit or make an appointment with a lactation consultant if we are ever concerned about his breast milk intake after we drop feedings. We actually own this baby scale, so I’m planning to keep an eye on his weight this way for my peace of mind.)
And then I asked him the big question… “HOW, exactly, should I go about doing this?”
Our doctor said we could obviously do whatever felt best to us in terms of dropping his nighttime feedings, whether it be dropping them cold turkey, slowly weaning him away from them or soothing Chase when he cried after a specified duration of time. We talked at length about the “cry it out” method of sleep training which our doctor said he would support for a 6-month-old baby at a healthy weight. While this method sounded like it would result in a lot of tears on both ends, it also sounded like it would probably be the most effective method given Chase’s personality.
In the past I did a LOT of reading about baby sleep. The two most recommended methods for baby sleep training I heard about from fellow moms (including a ton of you guys!) seemed to come from Moms On Call and Baby Wise. I bought and thoroughly read both books and I see now that back when Chase was four months old and I felt incredibly defeated by his lack of sleep and need for nighttime nursing sessions, I wasn’t emotionally ready to dive into sleep training.
I was worried about my tiny baby. Chase wasn’t anywhere close to self-soothing yet and I wasn’t emotionally in a place where I could let him cry for extended periods of time, nor do I think this was the best thing for my baby at that time. Our pediatrician said to wait until Chase was bigger and older to really work on sleep training him and that was the validation I needed to hear to make me feel like I wasn’t failing at life with a baby who was still up all the time. (I also read Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child which was SO helpful for me and made me feel like it was okay – and even normal – to be regularly feeding some babies in the middle of the night.)
It was hard to hear moms with babies significantly younger than Chase talk about their little ones’ amazing sleep habits or read status updates from mom friends on Facebook talking about their “amazing little sleeper” when I was putting full cups of coffee away in our kitchen cabinet, forgetting things left and right and publishing blog posts with more typos than ever before.
But there was one thought that helped me more than anything during this time: If horrible nighttime sleep is the worst thing we’re facing with Chase right now, we are SO LUCKY. Seriously. I know how blessed we are to have a healthy baby boy and I tried centering my thoughts in gratitude which honestly made the BIGGEST difference for me during the sleepless nights.
But now Chase was six months old. He was healthy, happy and had mastered the art of self-soothing. I could successfully put him in his crib awake during naptime or after his nighttime feedings and he could grab his pacifier and put it in his mouth to help him calm down when he’d start to fuss or cry. Our doctor gave us his blessing (and strong encouragement) to start sleep training.
We were ready!
Our First Sleep Training Experience
We went into the night unsure what to expect. We went through our usual nighttime routine (bath, cuddle time and nursing) and I made sure Chase had a good, long feeding before I placed him in his crib around 7 p.m.
I then I did a “dream feed” at 10 p.m. both so I would feel better about Chase getting some food in his belly and for the added benefit of taking some of the pressure off my breasts since they’re obviously used to producing milk all night long. The dream feed worked perfectly – Chase stayed calm and sleepy but nursed like a champ and immediately returned to sleep with no fussing when I placed him in his crib.
And then we waited.
Chase woke up for the first time around 12:45 a.m. I’m assuming his full belly after his “dream feed” got him through his first usual wake up time of 11 p.m., so that already felt like a small victory.
At 12:45 a.m., Chase woke up and started to lightly cry. This is when I would usually shoot out of bed and nurse him. This time I waited and let him cry. He cried on and off for 15 minutes. He would cry until he located his pacifier (<— one of the three Wubbanubs we surrounded him with in his crib!) which he would then put back in his mouth. This would soothe him for a while… but he kept waking up and fussing off and on for about an hour and a half. He didn’t have any LONG durations of extended crying/wailing which was such a relief. I’m not sure how I would’ve handled that, but Ryan and I were both prepared to let him cry for longer than we had in the past as he learned to soothe himself back to sleep and realized that nighttime nursing wasn’t going to happen.
Eventually Chase settled into a sound sleep while I stared at the baby monitor for hours. He woke up again around 3:30 a.m. and repeated the same behavior from his first wake-up. On-and-off crying until he’d find his pacifier, give it a few sucks, fall asleep, wake up, whimper again and repeat. This lasted for a little less than an hour but again didn’t include any long periods of hysterical crying.
I started to count my blessings and cross my fingers. Maybe this was going to work… I actually managed to fall asleep myself after this spell and when I awoke at 6 a.m., I grabbed the monitor and stared hard at my baby’s chest and watched it move up and down, up and down. He seemed to be sleeping contently and even though my breasts felt like ROCKS and looked like they had doubled in size, I felt the biggest sense of relief.
Chase woke up at 7 a.m. making happy baby coos. I went into his nursery to feed him and he gave me his typical full-body morning smile. He happily kicked his feet, grinned his gummy smile and pumped his little fists in excitement. I scooped him up, half expecting our typical super-short morning nursing session. What happened next proved that my pediatrician is a wise, wise man.
Chase ate and ate. And ate some more. It was a good, long feeding (our longest morning feeding ever!) and I felt my whole body relax as I realized this whole sleep training thing might actually work for us. My baby might be able to work toward sleeping through the night. He can miss nighttime nursing sessions and eat MORE during the day.
The second night was similar to the first night, but the duration of time Chase spent awake and fussy seemed to be cut in half. Ryan and I were shocked and I sent an enthusiastic text to my mom sharing our progress.
The third night amazed us even more. We heard Chase wake up and fuss only one time and within five minutes, he was back asleep until 7 a.m. I was AMAZED. Amazed, relieved, hopeful and, most astonishing of all, well-rested.
I feel like we totally lucked out with our sleep training experience. I have heard and read horror stories so I feel quite grateful Chase seemed to make this transition as well as he has… So far, anyway. Believe me, I know baby sleep habits can change in a flash and I’m not naive enough to think we don’t have more challenging nights ahead of us in the future.
Now, a week and a half in, Chase has been sleeping consistently through the night from about 6:30 p.m. to 6:30 a.m. Occasionally Chase will wake up in the middle of the night and fuss for a minute or two before he finds his pacifier and returns to sleep. (I still cannot seem to stop waking up a couple of times in the middle of the night like a paranoid mama to check the baby monitor, but I’m sure I’ll chill out eventually.) I’ve continued with the dream feed as well, but now that my breasts seem to have adjusted to no longer feeding Chase in the middle of the night, I hope to work toward dropping this nursing session in the near future as well.
What I Believe Contributed To Our Success
As I reflect on our first baby sleep training experience, the bullet-point lover in me must share a short list of the things we did that I think made the experience what we would consider a successful one:
- We waited until our pediatrician was fully on board and encouraged us to start sleep training. This gave us the resolve to stay out of his nursery when I found myself feeling the pull to go in, scoop him up and feed him.
- We waited until we were emotionally ready. Ryan and I were on the same page and both felt like it was in the best interest of Chase to work toward extending his nighttime sleep.
- We waited until Chase was able to fall asleep on his own during nap time and nighttime nursing sessions. I knew, before we began sleep training, that Chase had the ability to fall asleep on his own since we were already putting him in his crib slightly awake. This helped me believe Chase could fall asleep on his own in the middle of the night, too.
- We waited until Chase was able to self-soothe. I believe this was the BIGGEST key to our success. Chase’s ability to grab his pacifier and put it in his mouth by himself made the BIGGEST difference for us. Knowing he had the ability to put his pacifier in his mouth made it much easier for us to stay out of his nursery while we waited for him to grab his pacifier and comfort himself without us.
Basically we did a whole lot of waiting.
Do I think we could have started sleep training Chase earlier with success? Probably. But we just weren’t ready. Sleep is so different for every baby (and every parent) and we’re all just trying our very best to do what is right for our little ones.
Right now I feel a glimmer of hope and a strong resolve that Chase CAN sleep through the night. He CAN eat enough during the day to grow and thrive. And I’ll give him tons of love along the way.
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I am so happy for you! I was just like you when we sleep trained, watching the monitor all night! My daughter was sleeping SO well and now at 6 months will wake up and talk to herself for 2 hours then she is over tired and will wake up at 530 (I’ve read overtired babies wake up early?). If you have any ideas on how I could help her sleep through the night I’d appreciate it. We don’t go in her room at all, that didn’t help. I’m so anxious and upset that I’m doing something wrong during the day to make her not sleep at night. She’s so overtired and I feel like a failure. On a happy note, I’m so glad you are getting some sanity saving night time sleep! You seem like such an amazing mom to Chase and Sadie!
Sooooo I scheduled this post to go live yesterday and wouldn’t you know LAST night Chase was up for quite a while at 3 a.m. He eventually settled himself again, but I ended up doing a lot of reading about random wake-ups around 6 months old at 4 a.m. this morning and it sounds like it’s totally normal and common during this stage of their development. I know that’s defeating to hear, but it’s comforting to know many others are going through the same thing! Please know you’re NOT a failure. Believe me, I’ve felt like I was failing at life MANY times since Chase was born, but as long as our doctor said everything looks good/healthy, I try to give myself a break (but that is HARD, especially when it seems like SO many other people have it all figured out). I also read something online once that said, “Every mom is losing her shit. Some just hide it better.” <-- That made me laugh out loud and also feel a little better. 🙂
7am?!? That’s awesome!!!! I didn’t sleep train William until 1 year but wish I would have done it sooner. Sleep has been a tough road for me with him. Being by myself certainly doesn’t help. When we make it to 5am that’s a success lol
Congratulations! This whole process sounds incredibly intimidating so I can imagine doing exactly what feels best for YOU and YOUR BABY is the only way to gain peace of mind! I’m sure good sleeps will be had by all only shortly! 🙂
Thanks for sharing your experience! I’m so glad it’s going well. My little guy is only a month old so sleeping more than 2 hours at a time seems like a pipe dream but I know it will come someday!
It definitely will! We were up every two hours for a LONG time. I feel for you and am sending supportive thoughts your way!!
Congrats!! That is so exciting and good for you for waiting until you were ready.
I’m so glad you decided to share this post! I’m due with my first in about 10 weeks. I’ve taken so many of your recommendations (basically bought every baby item you’ve ever mentioned! Including the healthy sleep book) I hope you continue to do posts like these- I definitely look forward to reading them:)
So excited for you, Sara!!! Becoming a mother is absolutely the most incredible thing and I wish you the very best for a healthy pregnancy and birth in the coming weeks!! <3 Thanks so much for reading and commenting!
Also due with my first in July so LOVE reading these posts 🙂 Did Chase self soothe on his own? was there anything you guys did to encourage it? love to hear more about that !!
Congrats on having a baby who sleeps thru the night! Sounds like you waited til the perfect time. I agree with you completely on the paci front…we sleep trained as soon as our little guy learned to put a paci back in his own mouth. It must feel SO good to get a full nights sleep! I used to look at the monitor all the time too. I keep the volume off now and keep the monitor on the floor by the bed so I don’t see the light come on. I can hear him from down the hall if he’s actually crying. Way to go, mama!!!
You handled a heated topic in such a lovely way! I am the mom of a 3 year who still doesn’t sleep through the night all the time. Sleep deprivation is no joke and I am so glad it is going well for you so far!
I’m so glad to read your success in sleep training!! It sounds like your little man was ready, always listen to your mama gut instincts!
My little guy is almost 4 months old and we have had some decent nights (5-6 hr chunk of sleep before needing to nurse), but still very inconsistent (last night required a feeding every two hours… I’m so tired today.) He is actually the biggest baby out of my three, yet my older two slept much better than he does, which is a bit disheartening.
I guess it shows that it doesn’t matter if you are a new or veteran mama, baby sleep is always a struggle.
Also, I think you have the right attitude in being grateful for sleep being the only real ‘problem’ you’ve had with your sweet baby. While being tired from lack of sleep is draining on us, it could be SO much worse!!
Good work!
Just wanted to say I’m so happy for you! My daughter turned one yesterday, and it feels like an eternity since we had those sleep issues too. So just know before you know it you’ll have a little toddler and the nighttime struggles will be a distant memory! There are pluses and minuses to how quickly they grow 🙂
Sleep has been a huge stressor in our life with our 6.5 month old, but I’m learning that sleep changes sooooo much this 1st year, so I am trying to roll with it. He still wakes once for a bottle in the night, but we are okay with that for now. Will weak him once he starts feeling better, and once these dang teeth pop all the way thru. It doesn’t help he has learned to pull himself up on the crib. I always tell myself that sleep is so developmental and it will happen when he is ready. Sounds like what you guys did worked for your family & that is the only thing that matters! Cheers!
This post was very encouraging to me! I am 35 weeks pregnant with our first baby boy and I am nervous about how it will all work out: nursing, sleeping, pumping at work, etc. It is so nice to read posts that are candid and really dive into the trials and tribulations of being a first time Mama! I ready your weekly pregnancy recaps every week of my pregnancy and it’s helpful to know someone feels the same excitement, anxiety, and overall nervousness that I do! Thanks for being so honest and open! I pass your blog onto all my friends who are into fitness, new recipes, and of course, my Mama friends! Hope Chase continues to sleep well for you both!
Thank you for this post! My daughter will be a year old in a little more than a week, and figuring out sleep was so hard for us at first. As with all things parenting, there is so much information out there–so much advice (solicited and unsolicited) that you end up feeling confused and like a failure. THANK YOU for being so candid with your experience and for emphasizing that there is no ONE WAY to do things. I wish I would’ve known that early on in my parenting days!
I also want to thank you as someone expecting my first child! Our little girl is due in June and I refer to your posts frequently. I have no idea how her personality will be or how dealing with sleep will be, but it’s really valuable to hear about different experiences others have gone through.
Hey Julie! Thanks for the sleep training post. I posted last week as my husband and I were about to start sleep training/night weaning our 8 month old twin girls. It sounds like we did the exact same thing as you guys did (and the girls were also up around 11, 2 and 4am to eat), and it’s worked really well for us, too! We’re on night 4 and the girls have done great. Some off and on crying on night 1 & 3, but not the all-night tears that I was expecting…I also think it’s been going so well because they’re able to self soothe at this age (we followed Healthy Sleep Habits “always put down drowsy, but awake”, as well). We’re also doing a dream feed at 10pm right now, but I’m thinking of weaning them off of this feed in the next few weeks. When do you think you’ll try and drop Chase’s dream feed? And do you think you’ll go cold turkey or drop the amount of time that you’re nursing at that feed?
Great job! I also sleep trained my twins at 6 months and it was a life saver! Just a note, this is a great time for taking the paci away so that baby can self soothe before object permanence sets in soon! It seems tough but its literally hard for like 1 day 🙂
My son will soon be four months old so this is great information to have on hand. You are an awesome mom!
So glad this has gone well for you and your family. As a mother of a 3 year old who is a fantastic sleeper, I know how hard it is to get them there. I read Health Sleep Habits and recomend it to everyone. Glad this went well for you and I hope it continues.
Hi Julie! I am a long time reader of your blog. I do not have children but love to read about Chase! So happy to hear that your sleep training went well! : )
I’m so happy to hear it went well for you guys Julie! I had a similar experience and was so relieved I shed a few tears of joy that my daughter didn’t cry for hours on end like I’ve heard others do. I was dreading it so much and anticipated the worse but miraculously, it all went pretty smoothly. We’ve had a few bumps along the way (my daughter is 10 months) but we were more prepared and ready to deal with them then we were initially. Somewhat related question for you…. does the light coming in from the window bother Chase in the mornings or during naps? I had to put up blackout curtains and a lot of light still gets through on the sides. Still looking for an effective and cute solution to that one!
I am one of the VERY lucky ones whose daughter (just a bit younger than Chase) generally sleeps through the night – for now – I take it day by day with gratitude and know anything can change any time! I wanted to comment because of your 10pm dream feed and interest in dropping it. We do the same thing but base it on how much she has eaten throughout the day. It is a little easier for me because I work outside the home so she does bottles all day and only nurses in the evening so I have a pretty good idea how many ounces she gets. If she has a good eating day, we don’t do the 10pm feed and she sleeps through. If her ounces are low, we do the 10pm feed and I think it helps. If she’s low and we don’t do the 10pm feed we tend to get a 4am wake up and she’s legitimately hungry. The big problem with that one is that she’s also slept enough at that point so she’s not exhausted and it takes longer to get her back down. Just an idea on dealing with the dreamfeed! Lastly, your son is adorable and you seem like such a wonderful Mom. I have been reading your blog for years and now love following along for this new chapter.
We sleep trained our daughter at 7 months. Her sleep hadn’t been the greatest and turned downright dreadful at 6 months with 3-4 night wake ups and taking forever to rock to sleep. Now at 9 months, she wakes up about once (or maybe not) and has (*knock on wood*) gone down easily for naps and in the middle of the night. I know it’s not for everyone, but it has totally made an amazing difference for us.
As far as breastfeeding, I don’t do a dream feed, but I do pump every night around 10-11 (she goes down between 6 and 7). I’ve heard that helps to keep up supply. And if she does happen to sleep all the way through the night, and I wake up super full, I’ll pump in the morning before she wakes up. I’m a working mama, so I need all of the expressed milk that I can get!
Good for you Julie! We did sleep training with both of our children, and now at 4 and 7, they are amazing sleepers. You are giving Chase an awesome gift that you will not regret.
I have mixed feelings about sleep training *very young* (especially breast fed!) babies, but I think at 6 months, they’re “mature” enough to handle it. Glad the transition went so well! Babies are incredibly intuitive- they won’t allow themselves to starve!
I have a baby who actually IS small (like not on the charts for weight – not merely just a little smaller than all the hugely chunky babies), so I was very nervous to give up night feeds, too. We were so lucky that he slept well early on but it became a challenge for us around 9 months (and counting!) because I’d always nursed to sleep. At 16 months old, he still is rocked to sleep. Oh well…I am a big believer in just doing what works for you and your baby! He’ll figure it out eventually.
Glad you’re getting a little more rest. Eventually you’ll stop waking up as often! 😉
Hi Julie,
Great post, thank you so much for sharing!!!! I’m 2.5 weeks from my due date with my first baby and already have such an interest in sleep training. A few questions if you have time:
1) Do you pump? I was wondering since you sound to be in pain when Chase misses his usual feeding times.
2) Has your pediatrician made any recommendation of when to take away Chase’s pacifiers? I’ve heard to take them away around 6 months so you don’t have a very paci-dependent 1 year old, 2 year old, etc. Supposedly after 6 months they become exceptionally attached and getting rid of paci isn’t even an option.
Thank you in advance!!
Kelly
My daughters are 7 & 8 now, but when i had my first, a friend passed along a sleep training book (not sure which one though). While there was a lot of great advice, i had to put it away after a while because whenever we would get off-track i’d feel like a failure. With my second daughter, i just kept telling myself that eventually she would sleep through the night, and for some strange reason, just having that mantra helped me through the rough patches.
I will also say that every time they cut a new tooth or got sick (or both at the same time, which often happened), our sleep schedules went right out the window. It always felt like even if they were only sick for a couple of days, it would take at least a week or longer to get back to normal. So many ups & downs! Sigh… just gotta ride the wave sometimes 🙂 Good luck!
Hi Julie,
Your experience sounds very similar to mine with my third baby. The first two never slept through the night and I was determined with #3.
You are doing a great job! No judgment here.
Thank you, Elizabeth! <3
Ahhhh this is exactly what I needed to read this morning. Our breastfed almost 3 month old does okay at night but naps terribly. Most of the time I have to swaddle and rock him to sleep just to get 30 minutes. No idea how to fix the naps and implement self-soothing. I’m also reading Healthy Habits; it’s helpful but overwhelming. I’m not ready for letting him cry it out. Any tips on how your baby began to self soothe would be great–I’d love to be able to put him down awake for a nap.
I think it comes with time. Babies usually don’t learn to self soothe until 4-6 months.
Thanks for writing this! My daughter is 6 months old and is just starting to sleep better at night. I felt like there was so much pressure when she was 3-4 months old to get her to sleep through the night, but like you said, my husband and I were not emotionally ready for it. I think the father’s emotional needs sometimes get downplayed with baby sleep. It’s just as important to them.
I’m curious, do you use the cry it out method during nap time? I always put my baby down for a nap when she’s awake and she immediately screams and I wait a few minutes before going in to give her her pacifier and a reassuring pat, then she screams again until she falls asleep. Its always a SHORT nap though! I wonder if you have any tips?
Congrats! Don’t be alarmed if he has a period of waking up in the middle of the night after he seems to be in a good rhythm–could be teething.
My son sleeps like a rock but my daughter will have sleep problems when she’s not feeling right or wakes up cold. Sometimes we talk through the monitor to get her to calm down–pretty amazing that it works!
Oh my goodness, his smile! I love it! Thank you so much for sharing your experiences so candidly. I know I’ve mentioned it before, but we’re going to (hopefully!) be parents next year, and it’s really helpful to have your detailed experiences explained in such a non judgmental way!
I loved reading this. We just had Annabelle’s 4 month appt and for some reason last week she was up at 1 am for multiple days, instead of her usual 3/4. I was feeding her if it calmed her down but the dr. said to stop because it could just reinforce it and to make her self sooth. Well, we’re still working on transitioning from swaddle, dealing with reflux, and it was a lot, haha. He suggested the CIO but going in at 5 min, 10, 15 and so we did do that a night or two until her next feeding, and last night when she went down (it was only 5 min thouh). I think once she can get the binky back in her mouth, things will be SO much better. I remember you saying Chase’s naps weren’t very good. Have they gotten longer? Did you transition from the Merlin suit to nothing? This unswaddling thing is SO difficult! ANyway, thank you so much for writing this. I am sure you are feeling TONS better since getting more sleep!
Good job mama! Im two weeks behind you (we met at the hospital tour, remember? :)) and honestly, you are rocking this mama thang! Every baby is so different and i love that you are always judgement free and arent forcing your ways onto others (mommy wars are real 🙁 and it makes me sad). I really think that Chase might have a new sleeping pattern (Ill be praying for that), my little one started the 7pm-6:30am schedule last week and I feel like a new mama! Praying seriously it sticks for both of us! Hehehe. I love reading Chase updates because you are always so graceful and refreshing- keep em coming!
I’ve been following your blog since before Chase was born. Love your writing and posts! I just wanted to share that we have two boys, one 4 years old and one who is almost 9 months old. When Breck, our older son, was 4 months old I was begged our pediatrician to share any magic secrets as to how to get him to sleep through the night. I read all the same books that you did and more (I think I read something like 5 or 6 different books to find a sleep solution – crazy, I know). Our dr. was a very straight forward, no-nonsense dry humor type of guy. He basically told me that like it or not, we could get up with him at night, or we could have him CIO. I hated the thought of hearing our baby boy cry, but finally I was too exhausted to get up 3 times a night (same pattern as Chase…) and function at work all day. The dr. said it would take 3 nights maximum and I told him that was BS and told him I would prove him wrong, that it wouldn’t work like that with our son!
First night, he woke up and cried for about an hour. I’m not gonna lie, it was rough. I cried for probably an hour and a half that night myself! Second night, he woke up and fussed (not hard crying) for a half hour or so. Better. Third night, and most nights to follow, he slept like a dream from 7 p.m. to about 6 a.m. and seemed to be a much happier, rested baby! I couldn’t believe it. I had to go back and tell our dr. I was sorry for not believing him (which is hard for me to do!). Needless to say, we did the same thing with our second son, and even though hearing your baby cry out for you is SO HARD, it’s worth it if you are all getting a good night’s sleep and wake up happier and more rested each day.
You go mama, glad you guys have crossed this hurdle!
Just remember with each phase of Chase’s life, it really does goes by fast and pretty soon you’ll be on to the next and then the next, and as clique as it sounds, really do enjoy it because before you know it, you will actually miss all the baby phases that you were wishing away as you went through them. 🙂
– N.
I’ve dreaded sleep training so much. Our son is 4 months and he still wakes up a few times a night to feed. I’m so nervous for his 6 month appointment where our pediatrician will tell us to try and cut out nighttime feedings. I hope our experience goes over well like yours did. Right now though, I’m not ready to really start sleep training him. I cherish our little 10 minute snuggles throughout the night.
I’m so happy your experience went well. 🙂
Just wanted to post a little note to you: don’t feel pressured to sleep train by your doctor if you don’t feel comfortable with it!! If you don’t mind the nighttime snuggles, there’s no problem with continuing them. You’ll know when you’re ready, and there’s no medical reason to stop overnight feeds. I think a lot of docs suggest it at 6 months because a lot of parents are ready for it, but it’s not required. 🙂 We sleep trained by I do miss the nighttime snuggles!!
you are SUCH a great mom Julie. Chase is a blessed little guy and i was a spaz when my daughter was a baby, haha and you are just doing such a fabulous job and have such honesty and a great outlook. Many blessings to you and your sweet family. Such a joy to read your blog, thank you! (and my baby is a college freshman now who NEVER sleeps. haha)
XOXO
Haha!! Love the comment about your college baby!! Thank you, Polly!!
Happy you guys took the plunge! Worth every tear! I’m curious, have you started chase on solids? I know you’ve mentioned rice cereal. You & I had the same due date, you were early & I was late, but our babies are close in age, we give our daughter Ramona solids & nurse/formula before bed. This keeps her full & sleeping 12hrs. Just a thought! We decided against grains & went with veggies then fruit. Butternut squash, avocado, sweet potato, apples, etc. Try it!!
We are slowly introducing veggies and fruits, too! So far avocado seems to be his favorite followed by sweet potato!
yey! Go Chase!
So happy for you all! Question: what does he sleep in? Are you no longer using the Merlin sleep suit?
We’re still using the sleep suit!
Thanks Julie! This is great.
Quick QUestion — at what point did you drop the 10pm dream feed? my little fat 4.5month old is sleeping through the night with a 10pm dream feed and i want to drop it so i can go to sleep earlier but i’m so nervous it will ruin the good thing we have going!
Did you have any problems when you dropped that 10pm feed?
We still haven’t dropped it! I also want to go to sleep earlier (I actually fell asleep at 9 and woke up at 10:30 to feed him last night), so it’s something I am hoping to work towards in the future, but right now we’re still doing it.
Got it, thanks!!
You did awesome! Sounds like you did everything right. We sleep trained at about 4 months but had a very similar experience. I actually had tears in my eyes reading your post as I remember those emotions so well! One thing our pediatrician has told us over and over is that once they prove that they can sleep through the night, don’t let them trick you into feeding them at night down the road. It’s the best piece of advice I’ve gotten to date. As my son has gone through different developments sometimes his sleep suffers. But I know that through solids and feedings that he is getting enough so I just have to let him soothe back to sleep (sometimes on his own and sometimes with my help). You can soothe WITHOUT feeding. You’re doing such a great job. 🙂
Hi! I just wanted to compliment you because I really loved this post and thought it was really well written. You come across very genuine, open and honest. I loved the disclaimer that every Mama should do what they think is best. I think a lot of bloggers come across as very preachy and you didn’t AT ALL. I also love that you acknowledged that you are SO LUCKY if sleep issues are your biggest problem. So many people fail to appreciate what they really have. (I’m early 30’s, single and would gladly give up my sleep and more to have a loving husband and healthy baby.) Anyways, I texted my friend (a fellow reader) this and then realized you deserved to know we were giving you props 🙂
Thank you, Jen!! I really appreciate you taking the time to comment and for sharing such kind feedback with me. <3
I’m a second time mom who had great success with CIO with our first. I’m a bit worried that our 4.5 month old won’t be as easy. I completely agree that you have to be ready and after reading this I realized that I’m simply not comfortable with CIO yet. I do have a question for you…did you wean him from Merlin’s Sleepsuit at the same time as sleep training? That suit works pretty well for keeping my son’s busy hands from flailing but doesn’t help him learn to self-soothe at all. He’s not as into the paci as Chase seems to be, or as much as my first was either. 🙁 Enjoy getting more sleep!
Oh man, we still have Chase in the Merlin suit (he still isn’t rolling from back to front) but the suit still seems to be key for us. I like that it lets his hands be free so he can grab his paci. I need to do research on dropping the suit — that will definitely be our next big battle.
I don’t even have a baby and this was fun to read. It was like reading a suspenseful story 🙂
Glad you guys are getting some sleep! xox
Thank you!! <3 Can't wait to see you in less than a month!!
I seriously am amazed how much our little guys seem alike! The only difference is that pacifier! Hopefully I can get something figured out sooner rather than later 🙂
Haha! I’m glad that someone else surrounds their baby with 3 Wubbanubs in the crib every night!
I’m pretty sure we would throw even more in there if we had them!! Haha!
Hi Julie! I loved reading this post. My son has just turned 6 months and his sleep sounds so similar to how Chase was sleeping before the sleep training. He will put himself to sleep pretty easily but is still up 2-3 times a night to eat and then wakes for the day anywhere between 5-630. Needless to say I’m exhausted! I’ve been so hesitant to cut out his feeds cause I’m worried he needs them but your post has given me a bit of confidence. I’m planning to try some sleep training this weekend to cut out his feeds (I think I”ll do a 10pm dream feed for now as well). Wish me luck! Thanks again for your post 🙂
Good luck to you!!! Our pediatrician told us to “pick a weekend and commit!” He said go into the weekend expecting horrible sleep, but know you’re doing the right thing for you and your baby. Sending lots of supportive and positive sleep thoughts your way! <3
Obviously not a mom but I have to ask, what is a “dream feed>” I’m guessing you’re feeding while Chase is still sleeping?
I’m probably one of those mothers who infuriates you with her excellent sleeper, oomph! Adeline has been sleeping through the night since about 6 weeks old or so, and now she’s sleeping 10-11 hours straight at 4 months old. She used to wake up at 3am a lot, but one night I just kind of tried to let her figure it out on her own and she eventually went back to sleep, then the next night, same thing, then by the third night she was no longer waking up at 3 am! It’s amazing how quickly she learned! I’m really nervous about a 4 month sleep regression, but so far so good! It sounds like you and Chase are doing great, you are such a good mama! The best advice my mom ever gave me was to follow your heart and your gut instinct because YOU will always know what’s best for your baby!
3 days is the magic #! My son cried hysterically the first night for an hr (count your blessings there!) while, like you, i stared at the monitor. Night 2, woke up, gave him paci, went right back to sleep. night 3, all night! He’s able to find his paci himself and go right back to sleep! Its MAGICAL! Ahhh.