The night before his sixth birthday, I had Ryder wrapped in a full body cuddle (we’re talking arms, legs, everything intertwined) and jokingly said, “Okay, now I think I’ll go to sleep just like this so I can wake up with you when you turn six.” His reply? “Yay! Finally!” I’m telling you this is the child who would crawl back into my belly if he could and I love the way he still reaches out to hold my hand and loves to be scooped up and cuddled. Ryan and I say Ryder’s love language is a combination of physical touch and quality time and he’s just the biggest joy to be around.
He makes our family so much better and is a constant reminder to all of us that home time and time together is the very best time. While Ryder loves adventures and activities, he loves being home with our family of five, Pepper and Lucky the very most. Watching him love on Pepper is the sweetest thing and she clearly knows she can always go to Ryder for endless kisses and cuddles.
Ryder is still our wonderful little introvert and prefers our family and close friends to large groups and lots of attention. He’s most comfortable around people he knows and loves but this year has been huge for Ryder socially as he’s requesting play dates alone with friends which was something that didn’t really interest him much before. His best friend is a sweet little boy he met at preschool named Quinn whose personality is very similar to Ryder’s.
Ryder thrived in TK preschool this year and adored his classmates and teachers. He loves art projects, puzzling, imagination games, exploring outside, swimming, catching and releasing various creatures, helping me in the kitchen, soccer, martial arts, basketball, building and creating. Ryder will also drop absolutely everything the minute anyone asks if he wants to play a round of Uno or Memory and is shockingly good at both games, coming up with strategies that often smoke any of the grown ups who challenge him.
He is still able to sit down and focus on projects or activities very well and seems to enjoy some quieter activities sprinkled in among the three-kid chaos. He’ll happily color, make a melty bead creation, do a puzzle, build a magnetic tile tower or play a game anytime. But don’t let his sweet and sensitive spirit fool you! Ryder is also a very adventurous kid and very likely to say “yes” to trying new and challenging things.
“Sensitive” is forever a word I associate with Ryder and I mean this in the best possible way. He has a sixth sense regarding the emotions of others and is the first one to notice when someone is upset or angry. He hugs me the longest before I leave and isn’t at all shy about expressing love in front of others. Ryder is very in tune to how those around him are feeling and continues to feel things deeply. While this can make things challenging at times (he struggles a bit to communicate his own emotions), I fully believe this is also one of Ryder’s biggest assets. He’s empathetic, loving, nurturing and so incredibly thoughtful.
We are working with Ryder on using his own words to describe how he is feeling because he’s also quick to shut down when he knows he’s made a mistake or done something embarrassing. I never want our deeply feeling kid to feel like he cannot express himself, especially among trusted family, and it’s a constant work in progress to help Ryder name his emotions, validate how he’s feeling, keep our boundaries, reassure him we love him even when he makes the wrong choice, etc. Ryder has done wonders to educate me on the different ways to parent and discipline children because a one-size-fits-all approach doesn’t always work with different kids with different personalities.
Sibling Dynamics
Ryder’s brothers continue to be his sun, moon and stars. There’s no one on the planet Ryder would rather play with than his brothers and the relationship he shares with Chase and Rhett is one of my favorite things to witness.
He looks to his brothers for different things, as their ages mean they play in different ways together. With Chase, Ryder still primarily looks to his big brother to lead their play but with each year that passes, he’s more assertive with his wants, needs and preferences, so playtime isn’t the Chase show at all anymore. The love for Ryder is reciprocated from Chase 100 percent and our two older boys are attached at the hip 99 percent of the time.
They genuinely enjoy each other and make each other laugh in ways no one else can. Their interests are nearly identical and they would live outside if they could, catching and releasing creatures, exploring and making up various outdoor imagination games. Sharing a room also means Chase and Ryder will frequently giggle and talk into the night and we often hear music blasting from their room before 7 a.m. as they begin their days with brother dance parties and imaginary play.
Ryder and Rhett have a slightly different dynamic and their relationship was the spiciest in our family for a few years as their younger and closer ages meant they were more likely to have meltdowns and fights over things like favorite toys, accidentally knocking down towers, etc. This has evened out a lot and their relationship is now dominated by play, imagination and creativity.
With Chase in elementary school and Rhett and Ryder in the same preschool, our younger two boys have had a lot of one-on-one time together over the past couple of years and they play so much better now than they did just two years ago. I am sharing this to give anyone with little ones who are a few years younger than our boys a little bit of hope. If sibling battles are a big thing in your house and very intense at times, it gets easier as children grow and develop into big kids who aren’t as likely to completely explode when their brother accidentally runs into the creation they made with their magnetic tiles. Now Ryder and Rhett run all over the house together and love making forts, playing with race cars, puzzling, doing melty beads, working on art projects and building a million and one creations with magnetic tiles together.
Random Things to Remember
- Favorite Foods: Popsicles, strawberries, blueberries, hot dogs, watermelon, bell peppers, pizza, carrots, macaroni and cheese, grapes, waffles, cherry vanilla ice cream
- Favorite Color: Red
- Favorite Books: Arcade World series, Press Start! series, Owl Diaries series
- Favorite Podcasts: Molly of Denali
- Favorite Songs: “Might Get Loud” “Shotgun”
- Favorite TV Shows: Octonauts, Paw Patrol, Puppy Dog Pals
- Favorite Animal: Penguin
- Wake Up Time/Bed Time: Ryder typically wakes up around 6:30-7 a.m. and goes to bed around 7:30 p.m.
Likes
- Playing with his brothers
- Catching and releasing creatures
- Making melty bead creations
- Puzzles
- Building with Picasso Tiles
- Riding his Nighthawk and Plasma Car
- Swimming
- Soccer
- Riding his bike
- Craft projects
- Building projects of any kind (especially helping us build furniture!)
- Books
- Cuddle time
- Kayaking in the lake
- Movie nights
- Imagination games
- Hot Wheels/any transportation toy
- Making forts and obstacle courses
6 Year Old Favorites
- NightHawk Ride-On (The big birthday gift for Ryder and Chase last year and the #1 toy everyone wants to play with during playdates at our house!)
- Card Games (UNO, Memory and Crazy Eights are his favorites)
- Kid Kayak (Easy for kids to use and so wonderful for lake exploration.)
- Puzzles (100-300 piece puzzles are his fav right now)
- Any Craft Project
- Picasso Tiles (Forever and always a fav and my #1 toy recommendation because they’ve been a hit for YEARS.)
- Melty Beads/Biggie Beads
- Costumes
- Bike
- Bug Cages, Nets and this Catch-and-Release Aquarium
- Art Supplies: Kwik Stix Quick-Dry Paint Pens, Pip Squeaks Marker Tower, Crayola Retractable Markers
- Glider Airplanes
- Legos
- Plasma Car
- Cars and Trucks
- Tonies (His favorite Tonies are the Paw Patrol characters, Super Wings, Octonauts and Wild Kratts)
- Power Wheels Jeep
- Children’s Knives (Perfect for slicing soft fruits and veggies.)
- Surprise Inside Bath Bombs
- Nerf Guns
Past Ryder Updates
- 5 Year Old Update
- 4 Year Old Update
- 3 Year Old Update
- 2 Year Old Update
- 12-13 Months
- Ryder is ONE!
- 8-11 Months
- 7 Month Postpartum Update: Life with Two Kids
- 7 Months Old
- Sleep Training After the 4-Month Sleep Regression
- Postpartum Q&A: Part Two
- Postpartum Q&A: Part One
- Ryder: The Next Few Days
- Welcome Ryder Thomas! (Ryder’s Birth Story)
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Happy birthday Ryder! Being an empath introvert is a superpower. It took me years to be proud of being one. I love that you are teaching him to care for himself as much as he cares for others 🙏
It really is — Ryan and I always say that whoever Ryder chooses to share his life with one day (should he choose to do so) will hit the jackpot with him as a partner. My mom is the same and I swear they’re the most incredible people. <3 I'm so, so glad you are a proud empath introvert now!!!
Happy bday sweetie…….I was looking forward to dislikes as well as likes … I always finds kids to be fascinating in their likes vs dislikes….adults, too.
Happy birthday, Ryder! Isn’t it amazing how distinct and special children’s personalities are?! I have two sets of twins, and it still blows my mind how very unique each child is, despite having the same pregnancy and early childhood experiences!
Ryder sounds like an amazing guy with wonderful supportive parents. I feel like he was just born yesterday though — how is he 6??