“Something Must Be Special About That Dog”
After I shared the news of Pepper’s passing, I received a message from one of you that said, “I remember when you got Pepper, I thought something must be very special about that dog for them to get something so different from a vizsla.” That’s exactly it. She nailed it. Pepper was so, so special. She was the rescue dog that captured my heart from the minute I clicked the link on the rescue website and saw her. I knew she needed a home and I knew it needed to be ours. What I didn’t know is how much we needed her.
I would’ve never said I was a “small dog person.” Never in a million years. But oh my gosh there was something so, so special about this fluff-bucket of affection and love. Pepper was the absolute perfect dog for a family with young kids. For our family. She took to the boys quickly and was a willing participant in all of their imagination games. She let absolutely anyone hold her and would peacefully hang out in the arms of adults and 3-year-olds alike. And she found her way into forts and puppet shows.
She thought car rides to school drop-offs and pick-ups were better than trips to Disney World. When we’d ask her, “Peppy, you wanna come?” in the morning, it was like her world just exploded in the best way and she’d spin in circles and bunny hop on her back legs until we’d leash her up and she’d find her spot as “Captain Pepper” in the groove of my hip as I’d drive.
Her only enemies in the world were the vacuum and windshield wipers.
She was playful and cuddly and always up for a snuggle session on the couch or a kayak ride in the lake. She was unsure of her new vizsla brother, Comet, when he rocked her world in December but fairly quickly embraced her role as big sister and the “alpha” which cracked us up. In the evening at bedtime, she would coerce Comet into the most hilarious game of “come get me” as she’d dive under the boys’ beds, wait for Comet to wiggle his much-too-large body under the small space and then pop out again, leaving us all cracking up as she did this over and over again. (This was actually one of Rhett’s first thoughts after she died. “Are Comet and Pepper never going to get to play their silly game again?” Ooph.)
She was also my girl and our intense attachment had me laughing and feeling a little Elle Woods-y if I would ever open the front door with this teacup of a dog in my arms because she was so far from the stereotype prissy little princess often associated with a fluffy little dog. She loved camping and hiking. Miles of walking. Swimming in the lake and jumping off one of the boys’ kayaks to swim to the other. She was a sucker for peanut butter and jelly sandwich crusts and a fluffy blanket. She loved curling up in the boys’ beanbag chairs and her cat-like perch on the top of the seatback couch cushions where she had the best view of the house and her people. But most of all she was in love with our family. A feeling that was more than reciprocated back to her.
I know from losing a dog before that the sting of adjusting to everyday life without Pepper is most raw and the hardest it will be right now. I know it will lessen with time as we stop reaching for her leash or reflectively bending over when we get home because she’d normally fly over to greet us with her bunny hops and licks the second she heard the garage door open. And I know I’ll stop physically feeling my heart hurt and that weighty feeling in my chest at nighttime as I read and long for her body that would normally be curled up into my stomach. I know eventually this will stop consuming all of my thoughts and overtaking my emotions. I know all of this but right now we just have to get through it. That’s part of what sucks. (We’ve even let our big kids say the word “sucks” right now.) And that’s not even scratching the surface of the horrific event that took her from us. That feels like something out of a nightmare and something separate entirely that I am only beginning to process. That’s another layer of absolute misery I would not wish on anyone in the entire world.
Right now I’m stuck where many, many dog lovers everywhere have been after the loss of a beloved dog: I just want my dog back and I miss her so, so much.
![\"Quantcast\"/](\"//pixel.quantserve.com/pixel/p-1e3-7hOJ_U8Bg.gif\")
I can’t get the devastating loss of Pepper off my mind, I am so heartsick for your family. Your post sharing all the ways she was such a special little girl warms my heart as we all process your loss. I hope it helps you to think of all your readers holding pieces of your family’s grief to ease some of yours. Prayers and hugs.
This is exactly how I feel. After years of reading this blog, I feel like I knew Pepper. To lose her in such a traumatic way is devastating beyond words and I can’t stop sobbing. I wish I could stop time and rewind for Julie and her family, so that it never happened. May their sweet girl rest in peace.
I keep having the exact same thoughts
You have been on my mind so much these past few days. When I leash up Barley for our morning walks I especially think of you and your walking buddy. Such a terrible loss. Sending so much love.
Julie, I am so so sorry this happened to your family, Pepper and most of all to you. I cannot imagine how traumatized you must be from this. I only thank God that the boys were not with you when this terrible terrible tragedy happened.
This is my worst nightmare with walking my dog. I try to avoid dogs at all costs because of this. I have no idea if the owner of the Shepherd was irresponsible or not, but there are so many people out there who are. They will yell… My dog is friendly… As their dog is charging at yours.
This is a good reminder to me to carry pepper spray. No one ever wants to use that on an animal, but in an emergency, like yours where you were totally alone by yourself and one small woman against a very strong dog doesn’t stand a chance.
I hope healing comes quickly to you and your family. I’m sure it’s gonna take a while for your hearts to mend and for you to get over the trauma of what you experienced.
So sorry to hear about your pup. We had a similar experience, our King Charles cavalier that was attacked by a German Shepard in our yard (on a leash, with my 10 year old daughter) thankfully, he and my daughter survived, but they both have permanent scars. So frustrating when pet owners don’t manage violet pets.
Oh Jen, that is so scary. I’m so sorry your daughter, dog and family had to go through that. It’s truly terrifying.
Pepper was the perfect fit for your family! She was your loving, furry companion and a beloved family member. I love how you said you knew she needed a home and that it needed to be your home, and what you didn’t know was how you all needed her. This strikes a chord for the unique grief that the unexpected loss of her life brings. Pepper’s impact on your lives and the beautiful life you all gave her is so evident through your beautiful and honoring tribute in this post. Julie, I love how well you knew her and appreciated her for her unique self. She brought joy, adventure, and it sounds like she kept you all on your toes surprising you with her fun, spunky personality. It makes complete sense you would want her back and that you miss her. I deeply wish we could give her back to you. Grief sucks and traumatic grief is its own kind of suck. I hope Sadie and Pepper are becoming the best of gal pals and sisters up in heaven🩷🩷
I have been thinking about sweet Pepper for days and have cried so many tears for Julie and her family. The one thing that has made me feel better is imaging Pepper and Sadie together in dog heaven. I wish I was an artist so I could draw or paint a photo of the two of them for Julie’s home. Pepper will always be remembered.
Julie, this horrible incident has been making me think about Jessica Simpson and the loss of her dog, Daisy, many years ago. I remember the same feelings or horror I felt at such unimaginable news. Because I had watched Newlyweds, it almost felt like I knew Daisy. That’s how I feel about Pepper as well. I am thinking about you all and praying for you.
Julie, I’ve read your blog/followed your content for years. I think before Chase was born. I’m so very sorry for your loss of Pepper. Her looks so reminded me of my childhood dog, Barkley. We lost him to old age and I’ve since lost my first adulthood dog, Diesel, to age/a sudden illness. The loss is always painful, but I couldn’t imagine the trauma associated with the way Pepper passed. Thank you for sharing her with us and my thoughts are with you and your family.
I’m so incredibly sorry for your family’s heartbreaking loss. I read your initial post on Pepper and it’s been in the back of my mind. I know the pain of losing a dog, we lost our Vizsla Reese in October (we were inspired to get her 11 years ago by Sadie ❤️) and it’s one of the biggest heartbreaks in life. I had a thought come to mind – what if this was Pepper’s life mission – to be there in a way that saved you and Comet. Maybe she came into this world and your family knowing that would be her ultimate purpose to save you during that attack. I know she was such a good girl, praying for peace and comfort for your family during this hard time.
Oh the tears I cried when I was shocked to read your blog post of Pepper’s loss 😞 I am so very sorry for your family. Losing a young healthy dog so suddenly and violently is something no one should ever have to go through. It’s just terribly unfair. I’ll be thinking of your family in the coming days and am sending lots of comfort. Please know your sweet little Fuzzy Pepperoni (I remember that full name ♥️) is going to remain in the hearts of the many people who got to read about her. And rest in peace, Pepper, the joy you brought your family is forever. (I’ve associated your blog with pups since the beginning, WAY back around maybe 2008 I remember posting a photo here with my own vizsla Evie wearing a Halloween costume. I always loved hearing about Sadie!) I lost Evie to hemangio extremely suddenly when she was 6~ each dog’s loss is difficult and terrible in its own way (I lost my next pup to cancer at age 10), and the trauma is certainly worth reaching out for help with, and I hope in time that can lighten the pain in your heart a bit. And as you know, as time goes on, the beautiful memories begin to crowd out the tragic ones. Our hearts have an amazing capacity for healing. My beloved mom died suddenly nine months ago and grief is so intense and heavy~ yet I always come back to the idea that those we love would want there to come a day when we feel happy again, and we can always live the example they showed us. I hope Comet gives your whole family so much love and even some laughs during this most difficult time. Sending comfort ❤️🩹 and Pepper will remain firmly in my heart and mind 🌈
Julie,
Thank you sharing such sweet memories of Pepper. I am continuing to think of you as your family during this very difficult time.
Pepper’s unique, spunky spirit definitely comes through in the photos <3 Been thinking of you and your family these past few days. I am so sorry that you have to go through this unimaginable loss. Sending hugs 💙
I just want to echo all the other comments and say I’m so sorry for your loss. Pets are such a precious part of the family, and what happened to Pepper is so unfair. I hope with time the good memories will rise to the top and be what you remember most about her.
You gave Pepper the best life ever. We will all m8ss her.
Hugs, janet
Julie, I am so, so sorry. We recently lost our young dog to a really rare infection. I’ve had to say goodbye to a dog at the end of their life and it’s so incredibly sad. But saying goodbye to a dog when you think you’ll still have so many more years with them was a whole different experience. I remember being so sad but also mad. It wasn’t fair! It wasn’t supposed to be like that! We were supposed to have so many more years and memories! It’s a different kind of grief that rips your heart in two. On top of that, managing your grief, along with your kids and your other dog is so hard. It’s hard to be your kids safe space when you are broken too. And it’s hard to watch your other dog when you can’t explain to them where their friend is. Your family will get through this. But it’s so, so hard. Sending you love 💛
Julie, I am a long time reader, although I have never commented. I am so sorry that this happened. I couldn’t stop thinking about it since your last post.
As another person who has lost a pet to a dog attack, I beg you to report this German shepherd to animal control. Do this not to punish the dog or the owner, but for your community, to protect other pets and people, particularly small children.
I am so sorry. I am thinking of you and your family.
Hi Caroline — I am so incredibly sorry that you have been through this. It has been the most horrific experience. I did not call animal control the day that it happened (I was just truly devastated and in shock and could not even wrap my head around what happened), however the next day I did call. I adore dogs (sooo much) and while I ultimately do not blame this dog, after hearing from multiple neighbors that this was not an isolated event nor was it the dog’s first attack, I did call (and told the owners I would be calling) because I felt like it was my moral obligation. There was absolutely no stopping that dog when it wanted to get to Pepper and it was truly terrifying. As horrible as it was (and it was HORRIBLE), I also keep thinking about how much worse it could have been if one of the boys was with me and the guilt I would feel if this happened again to another dog or, God forbid, a small child. That is not something I could handle. I’m heartbroken knowing that this feels like it was ultimately a preventable event since there were previous attacks, and they also were aware that their fence was not keeping their aggressive dog secure. It’s been miserable to navigate Pepper’s loss and all of this on top of it. 💔
Oh my gosh, Julie, that is absolutely devastating. I am so, so thankful you called animal control. Were the owners extremely apologetic to you? Not that it made a bit of difference but I truly hope they were. I am an animal lover and have been devastated by your news, but I also want justice for Pepper in this case.
Oh Julie. I’ve been reading this blog for 16 years, and I have been present for your heartbreaks and losses and wins and joys, even though I almost never comment (I did write the latke guest post 100 years ago from Australia :)). This one is so freakin’ horrible. My wife knows my love of your blog and my regular reading of it, and saw my face and knew something was terribly, terribly wrong. We just lost our beloved Silas from sudden brain cancer a few weeks ago, but at least he was 10.5 and a husky, so he was a good ol’ boy. It was still heartbreaking for our kids and I can only imagine how terrible it was for you all with no warning. We are both so sorry for your loss and sending you warm support for your grief across the country. All our love.
i’ve been thinking of you and pepper and your family so much. i loved following you for years and years — since before chase was born! i once emailed you when i had just recently experienced a pregnancy loss, and i will never forget your kindness and compassion. i wish i had words of comfort to offer like you did for me. just like you told me about my baby, pepper (and sadie!) are looking down at you, telling all the other pups up there, “that’s MY family!” with so much love and pride.
Sending love right back to you, Joanna <3 This comment made me cry (the good kind of tears) and I appreciate your words so much.
Thinking of you Julie, as many above I have had a similar experience. I cried and cried for you when Sadie passed away and cried when I read about Pepper. I’ve been reading long before Chase was born and feel like are a friend I just don’t talk to much in person. I tell my husband news of you and your family, I’ll say you know the blog I’ve read forever and he knows it’s pbfingers.
Something to consider when you feel ready is counseling about the event. It can be so traumatic and leave you nervous about all other dogs consciously or subconsciously. Sending you a huge hug.
Aww, Pepper.
I remember being so, so devastated by the loss of our family dog. While it was not nearly as traumatic as how you lost Pepper, it was something that really, really bothered me for a long time (tl;dr – the vet messed up as we put her down). And I truly could not stop thinking about how our sweet dog didn’t deserve to have her last few moments be stressful or painful as she left the world. And a friend gave a picture frame with our dog in it and the frame said “Thanks for everything, I had a wonderful time!” It is so, so simple but it really helped click into place that our dog knew she was loved and really, we all had a wonderful time every day together. The stress of her last few moments would never erase how full and wonderful her life was.
Next, someone sent me a Facebook post they found. I think with Pepper’s life being so short it works beautifully here.
Here is the excerpt. Your family and Pepper were the perfect match!
“We sat together for a while after Belker’s Death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives. Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, ‘I know why.’
Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me. I’d never heard a more comforting explanation.
He said, ‘People are born so that they can learn how to live a good Life – – like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?’ The Six-year-old continued, ‘Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don’t have to stay as long.’”
‘
Pepper didn’t have to stay as long because your family helped put it together for her. <3 I hope this helps. Not to make it about me but to share what really helped me <3 thinking of you all!
This is so beautiful. Thank you for sharing this with me — dogs are just so, so special.
I have been thinking about you and your family since I read the last post, and sending love and prayers toward North Carolina.
What you went through and are going through as yourself, a mom and someone who loved Pepper with your whole being is so heavy, and layered in pain.
If we were friends in real life, I would encourage you to talk to someone- a pastor, a therapist or that one friend who had a way with hard things. This is a true trauma. We aren’t meant to deal with those on our own.
None of this is your fault. I am sure you know this, but I just wanted to put it out there, in case you needed to hear it again.